Golddigger

Well, our '08 Christmas trip home is over. Some of the highlights:

1. On the flight to the Lou, Jeannie and I watched a twenty-something pick her nose for a good 20-30 minutes. Basically, anytime during the flight that she was awake, she was picking her nose. Awesome.

2. Response to the bushier beard seemed generally positive.

3. Familial response to the fact that Jeannie and I are going to start looking for a house in Baltimore was generally positive. Folks (including friends in the realty business) agreed that it is a good time to try and buy.

One of the lowlights of the trip is that our age is starting to very obviously catch up with us, as we were back at her parents' place and in bed by 11 or 12 every night we were there. Lame.

Nonetheless, it was good to see many party people. And the trip was not too rushed. And although I was experiencing a bit of general malaise, I still enjoyed myself.

Eating Pizza Makes My Mustache Smell Like Vomit

This year has felt very strange at work. Just...strange. 'Tis neither bad nor good. Whatever.

Tying up a few loose ends:

I finished Infinite Jest about 2 weeks ago. As always, I immediately wanted to go back to the beginning and start reading it again. I refrained, and instead have been reading A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again. I think, come January, I shall start reading Don Delillo's White Noise. Why not.

For the last few days I have regretted writing about interest rates in my last post. I do not want to be the type of person who blogs about interest rates. I also do not want to be the type of person who thinks very often about interest rates. I would guess that thinking about money is at the root of a lot of the troubles and worries and problems in the world, and that's a tub of crap into which I do not want to throw my hat. So instead I'm going to think about getting some sort of electronic drum kit and working on making it sound like a real drum kit. Also going to put thought into the set I'm working on, and how to make it nice. And how to make it cheaply. It's fun to think about wood.

Yesterday the Jeanners and I went to a memorial service for T. Long, who was a close friend of MAW's and who we didn't know super-well, but we had hung out a few times, and I had come to really like his work as a director and an actor. Plus, he just seemed like an all-around good and interesting guy. Mid-forties. Sudden heart attack. I thought the memorial service was well done, and a few people said some very nice things. And it's hard to be at a memorial service for someone who died suddenly, and to be listening to the things people were saying, and not think about the way in which you live your life, and the things people would say about you if you died tomorrow. I think that pretty much I don't care what people might say about me, as long as they were able to say 2 things: I loved my friends and I loved the J-Dog. And that I did those things well. I think that when it comes down to it, those are the only 2 things in the world I care about. And interest rates.

I would also like to take this opportunity to publicly (and perhaps inappropriately) request that no Josh Groban be played at my funeral. Stick to Tom Waits.

Also, I would like to be buried at sea.

Also, if there is a funeral before I am buried at sea, I would like to be wearing a wig when I am laid out. Color and style unimportant.

I think that those are all the post-mortum requests that I have at the moment.

Tomorrow: Nachos and Beer with Bewley. Jealous, aren't you.

Holidays '08

Well, I usually don't go a week between posts. No good excuse, really. Work is getting busier, but not busy enough. It's been kinda frustrating for the last week or so, but mainly I think just because everyone is stressed about the "tough economic climate." Whatever the reason, it hasn't been laid back and fun this season, and I blame mostly myself for that. And Bewley. And Korn. Ha Ha.

On my day off on Monday, Jeannie arranged for me to be able to work in the Habitat wood shop, so I was able to get lumber delivered and start working on the set for "The Country Wife". It was really wonderful to be working in a full shop again, to have room to work, and all the materials and tools that I needed. Sigh. One day CSC will have all this type of stuff on-site, I hope. Would make life much easier. But anyway, it was fun on Monday to be working. And I realized that I cannot work on a set without thoughts of Ron Ryb flooding the ol' memory all day. A good thing.

Can't wait for Christmas to be here, can't wait to get back to The Lou (even if it is going to be a lightning-quick trip) and see friends and family. Can't wait for work to go back to normal.

Jeannie and I are planning on diving in to house hunting when we come back for the new year. Meeting with money folks, etc. I keep hearing of all the interest-rate cuts happening, and start rubbing the ol' hands together. I'm thinking that it really is going to be a decent time to buy a house. And the Jeanners is getting super-excited about having a place of our own (read: a porch and a large garden).

Well, I've got the day off today. I need to run some errands, but I think I'm not gonna start until I've had a tasty breakfast of eggs and black beans. Remember when I used to eat bacon all the time? Jeez.

Multiple Blasts From the Distant Past

I just decided to have a piece of that lovely apple pie for breakfast. I'll be right back...

DAMN, this is good pie. And the best part is that last night, Jeannie told me that she doesn't like it and it made her tummy hurt, so she's not going to eat any more of it. So I get the whole rest of the pie for myself. But really, I'm attacking it with pretty regular voraciousness, so it won't be around much longer.

Is there a better word than 'voraciousness' for the noun-form of 'voracious'? I think there is (maybe voracity?) but I'm too lazy to look it up.

Last night I spent a good portion of the evening friending people from grade school on Facebook and uploading old pictures. It is truly a trip. Very surreal seeing people that I haven't seen in 20 years, all growed up and with kids. Kinda makes me feel old, but not too bad. I don't think I've changed too much since then, though. Equal parts silly and serious. Equal parts happy and sad. Balanced. The only major things I've lost since then are excitement and, to a lesser degree, some curiosity. I don't miss the excitement, but I wish I could get some of the curiosity back.

The Jeanners had her last Physics class last night. It's strange, but I think she'll miss it. I think she enjoyed being good at something at which she thought she would be lousy.

I'm off work today. Many dishes to be done, and a trip to the gym. Maybe a long run.

Worked on some music last night. Recorded, took a break and went for a walk, came back and listened to the recording and it sounded like shite. Oh well. I guess that happens about 90% of the time, but the 10% that it doesn't is worth the effort.

Cheek, Cheek, Sack, Dick, Leg, Leg.

I've had some music sitting around, hoping something something would spring from it, but nothing has. So screw it. Here it is:



Jeannie made an apple pie last night, and I think it's the best apple pie I've ever had.

Thanks to all who voted in "Decision '08: Dough". The polls are still open.

Dough

Informal poll here:

Do you like eating raw dough? Doesn't matter what kind of dough. Could be pizza dough, could be pie crust, just any kind of uncooked dough. For the sake of the poll, though, let's leave out cookie dough because everybody knows that it's delicious.

Dough. Tell me all about it.

Okra, Enough to Choke Ya

Woke up this morning cosmically Bored, with a capital B, feeling blah. Yet had plenty to do. Just procrastinating. So I spent the morning sitting in the tub and chain-watching Sports Night episodes.

Been listening to some Chris Smither lately (who I would recommend for fans of ol' Greg Brown), and when I listen, the songs take me right back to our Alaska trip earlier this year, which was when I first listened to any of his stuff. I can totally picture Spiff and I in his kitchen, rolling dice, drinking Guinness, a bright morning light coming through the window, smell of eggs and bacon, listening to a lot of good tunes.

The J-Dog and I have been talking lately about our plans for the future, specifically house-buying and J-Dog-school-returning-to. We're thinking it's probably a pretty darn good time to look at houses, what with interest rates being real low and house prices dropping. And we've got some money in the bank that ain't doin' nothing. And it's a bad time to quit a job and move elsewhere, so it's looking like '09 might be the year that D-Bone and J-Dog hunker down and start playing Grown Up.

I'm off tomorrow, and I'm planning on doing some preliminary-type work on the set for the show I'm starting to work on, "The Country Wife", which will be going up in February. And laundry. Gotsta do laundry.

Magically Delicious

Back in June I went on a diet and started exercising, and ever since then I've been running a few times a week (more often in the summer, somewhat less in the fall/winter but still pretty regularly). Tonight I went running in the rain after a nice dinner over at Eric and Lauren's (who this afternoon kindly invited us over for dinner). Usually when I'm running I think about death or something like that, but tonight I was thinking about Art, and about Lucky Charms.

Lucky Charms is the best cereal, and when I was young I didn't really understand why it is the best cereal, I just enjoyed it. But as I got older and tried different things, I began to understand why it is the best cereal. One of the things that I tried that helped me to understand why Lucky Charms succeeds in being the best cereal was attempting to eat all of the oats and leave myself a bowl full of marshmallows. I figured that getting all of the oat-eating out of the way would leave me, at the end of the bowl, with about 10 bites worth of pretty much pure sunshine happiness. But I learned it wasn't true. For me, anyway. Spoonfuls of marshmallows were not as good as a mix. A balance. Of oats and marshmallows.

And here's the really important thing that I've learned since then: it's the oats that make Lucky Charms a cereal that can be regularly and consistently enjoyed--I could eat it every day and still be OK with it. And it's because of the oats. Just marshmallows I would get sick of pretty quick.

I think the Lucky Charms folks get it right because they have more oats than marshmallows. The marshmallows are there pretty much just to spice things up a little bit, but it's really the oats that keep you coming back for a lifetime.

And the same is probably true of Art. For the analogy, I think of marshmallows as things that are florid, poetic, aesthetically beautiful -- the chorus, the hook, the really nice lighting; I think of oats as things that are mundane, boring, simple, quiet. The verses. The general wash.

Bob Dylan songs are, to me, the Lucky Charms of music; it's why they've stood the test of time. There's some great poetry in them, but there's a shit ton of incredibly mundane lines, too. The things are composed entirely of verses and no chorus, for the most part. And even breaking it down further, the lines are generally composed of oat words with a few marshmallows that are the ones that steer the line downward into your gut. And the music behind it all is usually pretty generic, repetitive, unassuming. Oat music.

So, the point of this all, I guess, is just a reminder to myself, to return to: if I start working on more music, I'm gonna focus on the oats.

Larry

I found out today that my uncle Larry died yesterday. He was a good guy. My mom's sister, Pauline, married him when I was around 13 or 14, I think, and he became well-loved by the family real fast. Super-nice, warm, welcoming, always smiling. Always said what was on his mind, and his words showed that there were usually nice things in his mind. I'll miss him, and I know my mom and dad will miss him a lot, too. And of course, my aunt.

But, I was told that he went home last night after a couple of different Thanksgiving dinners, sat in his chair, and a little while later fell over dead. Not a bad way to go. He deserved a gentle death.

That's all I got for right now. Thanksgiving was fine. Black Friday was fine.

Sally the Saw.

I rarely feel the desire to have relations with inanimate objects [anymore], but I bought this compound miter saw for CSC yesterday and I am totally in love. I have wanted the company to have a chop saw since, like, day numero uno, but felt that we were never in a position to spend the cash on one until now-ish. That's probably not true. We probably could've bought one at any point but for some unknown reason didn't. But the point is that now we have one and I love her and I've named her Sally.

It's the day before Thanksgiving, the bestest of all the holidays. I sure will be missing all the cool kids this Thanksgiving. It just ain't the same without them. We are, however, currently in talks planning for a fake-Thanksgiving sometime this spring, which is exciting.

I have made a kick-ass Christmas song mix to play at the store during this exciting holiday season. It includes classics such as "Do They Know It's Christmas?" by Band-Aid, "Last Christmas" by WHAM!, and "All I Want for Christmas is You" by Mariah Carey. And others. I'll also be bringing in my Herb Alpert X-mas CD, and the Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack, a perennial B&N favorite, which for some reason was left off the offical B&N 2008 approved In-Store playlist.

Our radiators are actually working this year. It's a pleasant change.

Have a happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

(should I have put a comma after Thansgiving? Anyone?)

Sweep the Leg

Last night the J-Dog and I practiced a little dancing, then we practiced a little karate (jump kicks), and then we went for a walk. I learned that even though 5 years have passed since I quit smoking, I am unable to walk by a cigarette pack on the ground without stopping to see if it has any cigarettes in it.

I am sad that even though Jeannie and I were practicing our karate moves, I was still unable to entice her to watch the Karate Kid.

Had a dream last night that Sean, Schlueter and I were in rehab. Jeannie was also there, but just because she was visiting. Everybody at rehab liked Sean because he played guitar and sang. Everybody there didn't like Schlueter because she was trying to get everybody to smoke cigarettes, even though we had all quit. And Sean had an affair with our rehab counselor. That was my dream.

I'm gonna buy a chop saw this week for CSC.

Nada.

Not too much going on. Been busy at work. It snowed the other day!

I'll be damned if that big ol' annoying fly isn't still flying around our living room. And it's still annoying.

The Exception That Proves the Rule

The other day at work, a coworker and I were talking about blogs and blogging, and I said that 'the days when nothing happens are when the posts get really interesting.' Hmmmm. Today I'm doubting the veracity of that statement. Not much happened today so let's see if we can make this an interesting post.


Had a whack dream last night involving the Bosco family, Alaska, Sean and Nicole and two guys I didn't recognize, a broken bicycle chain, a funeral, the J-Dog, and staying with my parents in a hotel.

I'm sitting on the couch, and the sun is going down behind the church dome across the street. No birds in sight. A crisp sunset, no clouds, the colors changing in definite lines rather than an explosive bleed.

I used the master key to our building (which I [mistakenly and unbeknownst to others] possess) to explore the now-vacant apartment on the first floor of our building. It's pretty huge, and although the basement is very large and has a washer and dryer, it was also kinda musty and mildewy smelling.

Someone (I think next door) is listening to Tori Amos very loudly. Shame on them. Doubly.

Today at work I was in a good mood, and I'm feeling pretty good about the way things are set up for Christmas. My unsucessful lobbying for people of a few weeks ago has bloomed into success, so I'm hoping that, although X-mas will be busy, it won't be crazy. Or too painful.

Every day I'm looking more and more like Shel. Head balder, beard bushier.

I'm about 7/8's of the way through Infinite Jest. A line that stood out: "It's weird to feel like you miss someone you're not even sure you know." Very true, DFW.

In case you were wondering, I just spent a ridiculous amount of time looking for that quote. I remembered reading it, and it struck a chord, but then when I went to look for it I couldn't remember if I read it recently or a week or two ago or what. I won't say how long it took me to find it, but it was far too long. It's on page 589, if you're interested. I basically reread the first 589 pages in order to find that damned quote.

Alright I'm done.

Dancing in the Dark

The Jeanners and I went out and celebrated our anniversary last night. We started out by going to a Mexican restaurant called El Salto II, which I thought was promising for its El Jimador/Chuy Arzola vibe but the food was kinda bland. Oh well. Then we headed out to the American Legion Hall in Towson for the Friday Night Dance.

A little preface: a while ago, Aimee and I had been talking about how it would be fun to go dancing, but not at a Baltimore meat-market style club, what we were looking for was something more like a wedding reception but without the wedding.

And the Friday Night Dance in Towson was pretty much like a wedding reception, except it was like a wedding reception where everybody was at least a good dancer. I'd say that Jeannie and I were in the bottom 1 percent of the dancers there. But it was a good mixture of ages, from probably 16 to 80, and a nice mix of casual and dressy outfits. And the band was kinda boring but decent enough to dance to. We had a good time, and I'm guessing we'll probably go back again sometime in the future. You up for it, A-Train?

Not much else to report. The weather has turned to usual November weather, and it's been rainy. I got caught in a little one-minute hurricane today walking from my car to work.

Jeannie is making fun of my typing. She is cruising for divort.

Four more years! Four more years!

Today is the fourth wedding anniversary of D-Bone and J-Dog. Please take a moment to stop whatever you're doing and join in the worldwide celebratory dance-a-thon. I sure hope Jeannie takes a minute out of her Physics class tonight to join in the celebratory dance-a-thon. (That squeaky sound you hear is the sound of a lone tear slowly making its way down my cheek.)

There's a big goddamn fly buzzing around our living room! Goddamn it, fly!

So much to write about I don't know where to begin...

Jeez, that big fly is annoying!

Last night Aimee came over for a long-planned and oft-postponed fondue party. Actually, it might have only been postponed once, but we haven't seen Aimee since last February, so this party was a long time comin'. I think it turned out pretty awesome. Hot melty cheese, tofu sausage, roasted cauliflower, apple cubes, delicious bread, muthaf*****' ham cubes, a bright and savory salad, and decadent cheese cake (4 varieties!) for dessert. Plus, we did some great internet research, most of which centered on the Sheen/Estevez dynasties. If you're ever planning a Sheen/Estevez trivia night, and you need to learn some fun-facts about either Ramon Gerardo Antonio "Martin Sheen" Estevez or Carlos Eugene "Charlie Sheen" Estevez, I recommend trucking on over to their respective Wikipedia pages. You will learn things. I especially was fascinated by the info on Martin Sheen's arms and their (the arms') relation to the way he puts on a jacket.

I also learned that Martin Sheen is not the father of all of the 'Young Guns.' Not even Lou Diamond Phillips (who we also researched a little bit.).

We also learned that there really is (sadly) a website called www.deadhookerremoval.com.

So anyway, it was fun. And at the tail end of the fondue party, PKP came over, because he was spending the night at our place because he and I had to be up in Towson early this morning for a performance of Macbeth, and he didn't feel like driving all the way back down to DC last night after his rehearsal. So he came over and parked on the wrong block, and then once he got to our apartment, he sat in this really squeaky chair and squeaked the whole time. Until he moved to a different chair. And then Aimee went home, and we blew up the ol' air mattress for Pat, and then we all went sleepy sleepy.

Then I got up early this morning because I had to be at the theatre at 7am, and I told Pat that I'd see him there and I went out the door (Pat didn't have to be there until 8am). And then I had been working at the theatre for a little while when the stage manager got a call from Pat, who told her that his car had been towed (from the block near but not quite in front of our house. Our neighborhood has fairly complex and bullshitty parking rules.). So that was super sucky and I feel really terrible, because it costs way too much money to get your car from the impound lot in Baltimore. Pat did tell me, though, that he yelled at the guy who was hooking his car to the tow truck (Pat arrived at the car just as it was being towed), and used lots of bad words and yelled at him (the tow guy) in a manner in which he had not yelled at anyone in a very long time. That people on the street turned and stared. This image makes me feel a little better. But I still feel bad.

So anyway, I think that brings us pretty close to up-to-date. I saw gas today for $1.97, the Macbeth performances went off without a hitch (I was just there for technical guidance and to act as a sort of assistant stage manager), I spent the afternoon doing dishes and eating leftover ham cubes, and then I bought a postcard with The Jesus on it to give to my wife. And that big goddamn fly is still buzzing around.

Tomorrow night the Jeanners and I will actually get to celebrate with dinner and questionable American Legion Hall dancing.

Sleepy Tears

Last night I woke up in the middle of the night and I was crying. Weird. Never had that happen before. I had been having a sad/weird dream about my mom dying [at the old power plant where I worked.] [holding 2 Marlon Brando DVD's.][Those are the weird parts]. What's also weird is that just the other night, Jeannie was laughing in her sleep, and I thought about what a strange thing it was that your brain is creating images vivid enough to make your unconscious body start laughing.

Last night before we went to sleep, Jeannie and I were laying in bed, cracking each other up. We decided that it's a good thing we're married, because neither of us could ever find anyone else who thinks we're that funny. She did tell me though, that I have the tendency to use the same jokes over and over again. Duh.

It feels like autumn has lasted an exceptionally long time this year. At least, it seems like the trees have been colorful and beautiful for a long time. I feel like usually by November it's gray and glassy and cold and the trees are black sticks. Not so this year.

Busy day tomorrow at work. All the Christmas stuff gets set up. 'Tis the muthaf*****' season.

I'm your density.

While doing research for this post, I learned that there are 13225 days until the presidential inauguration that will be held on Friday, January 20th, 2045. I will be 67 years old then. God bless the Internet.


It's November 5th, and that tells me three very important things:

1. It's Jack Steinmetz' first birthday. Happy birthday, Jack! Congratulations on some wonderful development!

2. It's Spiff Chambers' birthday. Happy birthday, Spiff! Congratulations on some wonderful development!

3. It's the day Marty McFly went back in time. Let's have a moment of silence as we think about this...


Speaking of Spiff Chambers, he's having a big CD release party this Saturday night, so if you're free, stop on by Maxine's in Girdwood, Alaska. Also, his CD is available from CDBaby. You should buy it.

How about that Barack Obama? Now, he just needs to live in a secure bunker deep beneath the earth and eat only pre-tasted food for the next 76 days. I am happy he won, and now I'm scared for him.

Voting Schmoting.

Only losers vote. So I decided to skip this one. I'll vote in the next one...

I'm just kidding. I voted. Jesus, I'm tired of people telling me to vote. It's like having someone come up to you and telling you to do your dishes, when you're already totally planning on doing your dishes as soon as you get home from work and have a gin and tonic. Get off my fucking back, voter police! I will say that I was pleasantly surprised in that it took me about 15 minutes to walk to my polling place, vote, and walk home. Zero line. It did rain as I was walking there, though. Also, I was harassed by the polling staff. But they calmed down as soon as I put my underwear back on.

Last night we had a company meeting for CSC, although there weren't as many people there as I thought there would be. But I still managed to get all nervous and bumble my way through my portion of the meeting--forgetting what I was going to say, lots of half sentences, etc. I think that any sort of social skills that I might have had in the past have gone away somehow, perhaps from lack of use. The only time that I spend any time with someone other than Jeannie is at work, and work has consisted of 6 years of saying basically the same 5 sentences over and over again. Anyway, I'm having a hard time around people.

Daddy update: he started his drip yesterday and everything went fine. No side effects. Woo-hoo!

I just got a call from my boss that they just caught this little bitch of a shoplifter that I've been wanting to catch for awhile. I really hated her because she was a normal college kid, totally has money and no obvious drug habit to support, just stole stuff cause she didn't want to pay for it. Jeez, if you're gonna steal stuff, at least sell it for drugs.

Addendum

An over-excited Schlueter has caused me to add that the new and exciting information mentioned in the previous post is not, in fact, really new and exciting. It is in no way cross-country move related or baby related. It has to do with changes to the way the theatre company is currently structured and set up. Exciting, no?

My Dream Last Night

So here's my dream last night:

CSC was performing Romeo and Juliet at the St. Louis Municipal Opera, known to those in the know as The Muny. For those not in the know, The Muny is a huge, 10,000 seat outdoor theatre in St. Louis, which performs mostly musicals of the Oklahoma! and South Pacific variety. And in true Muny fashion, CSC's Romeo and Juliet had a 200 member children's chorus, a huge balloon release, and 10 minute scene changes. BJ was there, and during the long scene changes, members of the cast would come out into the audience and we would all hang out. Some folks from grade school and high school were in the audience. Pat played the role of Balthasar, although in his final scene he was beheaded, which I don't exactly remember happening in the real play. Anyway, Pat's final scene, in my dream, was a filmed version of his beheading, and then his beheaded head saying his final lines. I remember thinking to myself that Pat's final, beheaded lines were the best performance that I had ever seen. By anyone. Ever. Unfortunately, because of the long scene changes, most of the audience had left by the time Pat's final scene rolled around.

Well, anyway, it was good to see the Beej and the folks from St. Louis. I wish I got to see more of my friends in places other than dreams.

Not too much else going on. The J-Dog is finishing up 4 days off work, the lucky duckling. On Thursday I had the day off as well, and it was a beautiful fall day, so we decided to drive around looking for some adventure and autumn color, and ended up at Catoctin Mountain Park out near Frederick, MD. Walked around a little bit in the woods, saw a little waterfall that probably would've been more impresssive in the Spring.

Got a CSC company meeting tomorrow night, at which I will be presenting new and exciting information. Lookout!

Funnies

Thanks to OAA for posting several things over the last few days that have made me laugh out loud.
(oh, and the audio is probably not appropriate for the workplace.)

How the Day Sounds

At work we listen to a lot of the same music over and over again. For the last two months or so, we've had a CD in rotation called Three Flights From Alto Nido by a guy named Greg Laswell. It's generally agreed that it's the only CD that we've been playing that the music dept. employees can still stand. I think the song "How the Day Sounds" is pretty damn solid.



My dad had a meeting with his oncologist to find out the results from the bone marrow test and CAT scan from a few weeks ago. It looks like there's no cancer in the bone marrow, which is a very good thing, and the doctor didn't have the results from the CAT scan. Which I don't quite get, but my dad doesn't seem too worried, because he said they did a CAT scan when he first went in with the kidney stone and they only saw the tumor in his abdomen. So who knows. But the bottom line is that he starts treatment on Monday with some drug that I've forgotten the name of but have written down, and it's some sort of drip. And he'll do that for three days, then go in the next week and get it for one day, and then the week after that, etc. for like 4 or 5 weeks. Then they evaluate. Anyhoo, that's the plan.

Strange thing: the kidney stone that my dad orginally went to the hospital for seems to have disappeared. Neither passed (that he knows of, and from what I've heard about kidney stones I get the idea that you can usually tell when you pass them) nor showing up on any sort of scans.

I feel a bit distant tonight. Wouldn't mind a G&T, but I think I'm going to abstain. The J-Dog is whipping up what smells like it will be a delicious veggie lasagna. I did help a little, but I've abandoned her to come fart around on the internet in the living room.

Effluvia

This morning I woke up with the word "effluvia" in my head, and I had no idea what the word meant, so when I got to work I looked it up. Feel free to view its meaning here.

I was off work today, except that I had to go in this morning for our weekly Monday-morning manager's meeting. This week's was especially painful. People seemed to be in their grumpy pants. Plus, I was going to use this week's meeting to start lobbying to get the right people working in my department for December, but because everyone was in their grumpy pants, my lobbying was not as successful as I would've hoped. I will continue my efforts throughout the month of November.

It was an overcast, gray day today. And after the meeting I went to the gym, and after the gym I came home and took a nap. And then my girlfriend came home from work early and we napped together. We both had spent the weekend working, so it was nice to get a little together-naptime in.

Tonight, we made our plans for our anniversary celebration, which will be happening in a few weeks. On the actual day of our anniversary, the J-Dog will be in her physics class, so we are celebrating on the following day, a Friday, and we're gonna go dancing at an American Legion hall. On a "50's and 60's" night. The website looked absolutely batshit crazy, so I'm both nervous and curious.

Thomas Tallis

I do enjoy sitting on our couch in the evening and listening to some relaxing music while watching the birds fly in loops above the houses and church dome across the street. There usually seems to be bunches of birds around in the evenings. Today's listening is The Tallis Scholars Sing Palestrina, which I borrowed from a guy at work and have been enjoying for the past few days. I think it will be a good November-Winter album. It's chilly in our apartment and the tip of my nose is cold.

Had an inventory at work last night, and a relatively painless one at that. We were done at around 1am, early enough that Abbey and Dan P. and myself had a couple of beers after we were finished. A good time. Work is better when you hang out outside of work every now and again. I don't necessarily know if that's true across the board or if that just happens to be true for this particular job at this particular time.

It's been a long week. I'm looking forward to a day off, but it won't be arriving until Monday.

I straightened up our apartment when I got home from work and made our bed. I am slowly (finally?) discovering the pleasure of making your bed on a (at least semi) daily basis. It just feels good to get into bed at night and have all the sheets and blankets be cool and heavy and smooth and cover your entire body, instead of having them bunched and twisted and trying to figure out exactly how they're twisted so you can stretch and pull them the right way to at least get your ass and legs covered enough to be warm.

It's just about dark outside.

Domingo

Havin' most Sundays off with my lady friend ain't a bad deal at all.

Although we didn't do that much today, really. J-Dog did a lot of physics problems, and I was on call as a consultant. So I read a lot of IJ. And we went to the farmer's market this morning and bought a lot of vegetables, which vegetables I then spent the evening chopping and peeling for a vegetable-roasting extravaganza which will probably take place at our place sometime this week.

Got an inventory this week at work, which I never look forward to, but I'm always glad to get 'em done. And a production meeting tomorrow night for The Country Wife, which will be going up in February. Not exactly sure what my job will be yet on the production (maybe designing, probably building) but perhaps I will find out more at the meeting...

I don't know what to title this one.

My dad got the results back from Monday's test, and the thing growing in his abdomen is, in fact, his old lymphoma. Back again. So that's the bad news. The better news is that it's stage 1, which is the slowest growing type, and most easily treated. So the plan right now is that he'll try some sort of drug that has apparently had some success treating this type of cancer. No chemo, no surgery, no radiation. So that's the plan, unless some of the other tests that he had yesterday and today show that the thing has spread or anything. And if the drug doesn't do anything, then I would imagine that chemo is probably the next step.

Anyway, I talked with him this afternoon, and he sounded both disappointed and relieved. He did use the word "crappy," which is a word I don't think I've heard him use before. "Crap" yes, but not "crappy." Anyway, I guess I'm feeling disappointed and relieved, too. The results could have been better, but they could have been a lot worse. So that's that, for now.


I got contacted by Maya Dimova on Facebook. It's good to hear from her.

I just tried to eat something that I thought might have been part of a stale chip, but it turns out it might have been part of my shoe.

Anyway, Maya Dimova, yes. She's married and living in Italy and has two sons, 6 and 2. Crazy Maya Dimova who used to work at The Blimpie. Now employed by Teatro alla Scalla. Wonderful.

To those who have at some point worked where I currently work: someone got fired from where I currently work, and I don't want to be super gossipy by mentioning this person's name, but I will say that he/she had worked there a long time, he/she knows where Osama bin Laden is, and he/she apparently routinely had his/her car's tires shot out.

Ok, Jeannie just got home from class. Yay! So I'm gonna hang with her now...

Perhaps it might very well indeed do a body good?

It is a beautiful autumnish day, and I am off work.

I had a dream last night about hanging out with K-Torr and his kid (perhaps as a result of leaving a Facebook comment several days ago about hanging out with K-Torr??)

There is a mouse (or some sort of animal) scurrying about in one of our living room walls. I am glad that it is stuck in the wall and not in our apartment. Nonetheless, the scurrying sounds are not enjoyable.

My dad starts his 3 days of tests today.

My dad has not been to a dentist for roughly 40 years. And never has any tooth-related problems. He says it is because he drinks a lot of milk. And he does drink a lot of milk, usually a glass or two a day. And since I have started dieting and stuff back in June, I have also started drinking a lot of milk (of the fat-free variety), about a gallon a week. And back before I started drinking the milk, I had been having some pain in one of my teeth, but since that time the pain has gone away. And so, long story short, I think my dad is right and that drinking milk is good for your teeth.

(or my tooth has become so rotten that the nerve inside is finally gone.)

Last night I ran to the B&N and then made it halfway home before I had to stop running and start walking. While I was running, I was thinking to myself that surely this had to be well over 10 miles, that I could easily run a half marathon, etc. Then I got home and Google-mapped it and it turns out that I only ran about 8-point-something miles. Which is good, and I'm pleased, but not nearly as impressive as the pain in my legs made it feel.

Laundry. Dishes.

Kachunk. Kachunk. Kachunk. Kachunk.

Today I rode my bike to work. And I haven't ridden it for a few weeks, and it's been sitting outside the front of our place (which is where our bikes live), and the chain has gotten kinda rusty. And so every time I pedaled, the chain would slip. Which made for a very annoying ride, indeed.

When I got home I oiled the chain which seems to have helped.

Not much else going on. The Jeanners and I went dress shopping this evening. The mall on a Friday night is a scary, scary place.

Started work on a new song last night. I'd been playing around with some chords and very sketchy lyrics for the last few weeks, and last night I was able to record a nice solid foundation, now I just need to come up with something to make it all interesting.

Tonight we watched part II of the seven part HBO miniseries John Adams. The second part was better than the first (but seemed longer -- was it longer?) and it's getting engaging. We'll see.

The reread of IJ is going well. I'm around page 180. Kneser, are you hanging in there?

Here We Are Now, Entertain Us

Wow, listen to those stocks fall! You can almost hear them whistle as they fly by! I listened to This American Life on Saturday, and the show was all the about the "current economic crisis," and basically just tried to explain what the hell is going on, and how it happened, and possible outcomes and/or solutions. It's pretty scary. And a little exciting. Although I'm guessing that if I had children, a home, or any sort of responsibility it would be less exciting and just scary. But anyway, it was a good program, and worth listening to online if you're at all interested in economics (which I usually am not, but still found the program interesting).

I have started rereading Infinite Jest (and have already, at page 77 or so, been reminded of why it is the Greatest Book Ever) and it has got me thinking about entertainment, and what type of entertainment I like, and I'm realizing that without a TV and with very limited exposure to movies, the entertainment I've been enjoying is a lot different than what it used to be. (It just took me like 5 attempts to try and type 'different' correctly). My current top pieces of entertainment (and maybe I would so far as to call these things 'art'): DFW stuff, Savage Love, This American Life, and Car Talk. And I think there's a definite common thread among them all, and it probably has something to do with the narrative tone and the word conversational.
But then who cares.

BJ called me on the goddamn telephone the other day. A mere one day after Schlueter and I had decided that we were writing him out of our respective wills because he is a non-answerer. So he's back in the will. TO BJ GAILEY I BEQUEATH: ONE SMALL-TO-MEDIUM SIZED BAG OF SNACK CHIPS TO MAKE UP FOR THE BAG I ATE.

For those who haven't heard: we think that the J-Dog got the highest grade in her class on the ol' physics test last week. She got like 160+%. She's a hard worker.

A Look At Yesterday

7:15am --Alarm goes off. Hit snooze once. Shower. Leave for work.

8:30am-11:30am -- Work.

11:30am-12:50pm -- Drive to bus station at the Maryland Travel Plaza. Get required passes for parking, pick up bus ticket, wait for bus.

12:50pm-4:30pm -- Ride bus to the Port Authority bus terminal in NYC. Listened to some DFW readings, latest David Byrne/Brian Eno album, et al.

4:30pm-7:30pm -- Arrive at the Port Authority bus terminal in NYC. Walk around Times Square a little bit. Buy some beers and a bag of Doritos. Walk around a little more. Get approached by a man who asks, "Is your name Augustine?" Take beer and Doritos and hunker down across the street from the back door of the Letterman show. For some reason, this is my absolute favorite place in New York. It's a good place to people watch, and it's out of the way. I saw, in order: Bill Hader, Calista Flockhart, various Late Show band members, Alan Kalter, and Paul Schaffer. Then walk to Schlueter's hotel, just around the corner.

7:30pm-10:45pm -- Schlueter arrives at hotel, we walk to restaurant in neighborhood. Some type of pub. I get my steak, have beers. Schlueter gets a wrap of some sort, has beers. We talk about lots of things. Good time.

10:45pm -- I check my phone and see that my bus leaves in 45 minutes. Pay tab, quick goodbye on 8th Avenue.

10:45pm-11:20pm -- Run down 8th Ave. a few blocks to the Port Authority bus terminal, which is large and confusing. I ask the person at the information desk if she knows where my bus will be leaving from. She says Gate 74. I find Gate 74 with a few minutes to spare. Above Gate 74, one of the destinations listed is the Maryland Travel Plaza (my destination), so I figure I am in the right spot. There is no bus and no people there. I wait for the bus to arrive.

12:15am -- Still no bus. I ask a Greyhound baggage dude walking by if he knows when the bus will arrive. He tells me that my bus left from Gate 78. He says that the next bus will be at 3:45am and that it will take me to downtown Baltimore, not the Maryland Travel Plaza.

12:15am-3:45am -- Fitful sleeping on the floor of the Port Authority bus terminal. Buzz from beers going away rapidly and unpleasantly.

3:45am -- Board bus to Baltimore. More fitful sleeping on bus.

5am-ish -- Vomit in bathroom at back of bus. Thank god for gum.

7am -- Arrive at downtown Baltimore bus terminal. Wait for transfer to Maryland Travel Plaza.

9am -- Arrive at Maryland Travel Plaza.

9:45am -- Arrive home. Poop.


So it was good to see Schlueter. Would I do it all over again? Yes. I would probably just have the Doritos, though, and not the beers before dinner. And I would ask someone different where I was supposed to catch my bus. But other than those 2 things, it was a really fun trip.

The Internet is Not Dead, Bitches!

I am getting a cold. Perhaps acquired from my father (who had a cold this weekend), perhaps acquired by swimming in the ocean when it was probably too cold to be swimming in the ocean. I went to bed last night at 6pm and woke up this morning at 6am. I drank a half gallon of juice throughout the day at work today. Must kick this bastard in its johnson. What the hell, "johnson" isn't in Blogger's spellcheck dictionary? How the hell can one compose a decent blog post without "johnson"?

My parents arrived on Friday evening and we drove up to Wildwood, NJ when the Jeanners and I got home from our respective jobs. We spent the weekend going to the beach, exploring the Jersey shore, swimming in the hotel pool, eating at various restaurants, and driving. It was a good time. Although Jeannie and I did have an argument. Which was definitely the low point of my trip. Thanks a lot, Jeannie! Sheesh! It makes me want to buy some new shoes and get a divort.

My parents ended up staying in our place on Sunday night, which was not planned but worked out fine. It's weird to have your parents sleeping in your bed (not while we were in it, of course. We were on an air mattress in the living room).

Found out some shit about my dad's stomach tumor. I'm gonna call it a tumor, because although nobody knows quite what it is, I'm pretty sure you can call pretty much any unexplained growth a "tumor". So anyway, he showed my the report he got from when they gave him a CAT scan for the kidney stone (which still hasn't passed, by the way), and from the report I learned that the tumor is not in his stomach (the organ), but rather his abdomen. And it's 11cm X 11cm X 8cm. Which is bigger than I had imagined it to be, and seems big. So it's concerning. And his tests are scheduled for October 13th, and it'll be like 3 days of tests, and I'm sure just not very fun. But we had a good chat about it (in the jacuzzi at the hotel) and he seems ok with it, and ready to face whatever is on the way. And of course, there is still a chance that it could be nothing. So we'll see...

Thursday I am going to take a bus up to NYC after work and meet Schlueter for a fabulous New York dinner (I think I'm gonna have a steak, goddammit) and then bus back late Thursday night. Looking forward to it. Headphones, reading material, walking around New York, Schlueter, dinner, headphones, reading material.

Doesn't Anybody Care About Long Turds Anymore?

A few interesting DFW links I have come across in the last few days, especially interesting if you've read Infinite Jest:

http://theknowe.net/dfwfiles/pdfs/Wallace-Amherst_Review-The_Planet.pdf

and

http://www.granadahouse.org/alumni_letters.htm

Also, purchased the Dolly Parton album Jolene yesterday and have been totally enjoying it. If you've ever thought that maybe you might enjoy a Dolly Parton album (and I know you have), I would definitely recommend this one as a good place to start. There's a bonus track where she sings a song called "Cracker Jack" that's about her childhood puppy (the titular Cracker Jack), and I know you're thinking, "Jesus Christ, Dolly Parton singing a song called "Cracker Jack," and it's all about her childhood puppy -- that sounds like my idea of a very very bad thing," but it's really not. And two main reasons it doesn't completely suck are A) subtle production and B) Dolly Parton's vocals. She can sell the songs, and she does it by honesty.

I had a dream about The Beej last night. I think he had come to town to see some sort of CSC production. It was nice to see him, even if it didn't really happen.

Both Jeannie and I were sleeping very very soundly this morning when the alarm went off. It's not often that we're both sleeping well. And 5:45 felt far too early.

My parents are still planning on coming for their visit this Friday. Daddy-o has not passed ye olde kidneye stone. But left a message today saying that he feels up to the trip.

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that I'll bet that this is the first blog post that ever talked about David Foster Wallace and Dolly Parton. Two great tastes that taste great together.

Update!

Well, there really isn't much of an update. My dad went to the oncologist on Friday, and the oncologist said, "Yes, we should perform tests on whatever this thing is in your tummy that showed up on the CAT scan for the kidney stone." The semi-good news is that the oncologist did not seem like the tests needed to be performed immediately and said that my folks could come out here for their visit and then get the tests when they return to the Lou.

So, now I'm just hoping that my Dad passes his stone (ouch!) before they come out here, we have a grand ol' time, then he gets his arse back home for tests and everything turns out hunky dory.

Other updates:

I ran 10 miles the other day. Jeannie knows all about it.

Eating less fat makes for very long turds. There, I said it.

Schlueter might be coming East! Possible NYC rendezvous in the works...

Me Pap

So I got a call from my sister this evening, who told me that my Dad went to the emergency room this morning, and the long story made short is that he has a kidney stone. And the other part of the long story is that they found a "mass" in his "stomach."

Now, we don't know what the "mass" is, and we don't know if "stomach" means the actual organ or what my dad calls the area between his boobies and his pants. So he goes to his oncologist (my dad had lymphoma back in the day, when I was like 8) tomorrow, for tests and probes and pokes and who knows what else.

(sigh.)

I just got off the phone with him a few minutes ago, and he sounds fine. He sounds like the thing he's most concerned about is trying to get my deposit on the hotel back if they have to cancel their trip. We are all professing the belief that we shouldn't worry until we actually have something to worry about, and at the same time I'm sure that we are all worried.

The Day

Feeling better. Woke up this morning and felt as though a little bit of the fog of the past few days had lifted.

Things of the day stuck in my head:

1. An old man and his wife came into the department this morning. I asked him, "How are you?" He said (in a cute, smiley old man French accent), "I'll have to go into deep communion with myself in order to answer that question."

Five minutes later, he walked by and said, "So-so."

Five minutes after that, I took he and his wife to find a Pete Seeger cd and he said, "Fantastic."

Then, five minutes later, as he and his wife came to pay, he said, "Overflowing with happiness."

I don't know. That little snippet doesn't do justice to the guy. I just liked his answers. They weren't standard "How are you?" "Good, thanks." answers. They had thought behind them. Which is more than I can say for my questions, and as a result I put a little more thought into my interactions during the day.

2. At about 11:30 this morning I confronted a shoplifter who was trying to steal some blu-ray DVD's, and when I told him that he needed to give me the DVD's back, he said, "ARE YOU ACCUSING ME? ARE YOU ACCUSING ME OF STEALING? CAUSE IF YOU ARE I WILL FLATTEN YOU!" And then I said, "Yes. Yes, I am accusing you, and I need you to give me those DVD's back. And I was very genuinely scared, because this was a big guy, about 6'3", muscular, 220 lbs, and an asshole. And a thief. So I was scared, and he tried leaving so I followed him out of the store and then down the street, and I asked him where we were walking to, and he said, "Someplace quiet so I can kick your ass." And I said, "Oh, OK," and kept following him. And I don't really know why I kept following him, because I really seriously thought that he was going to at least punch me in the face. And I was still scared. But for some reason (and I will interject here [in admittedly stolen DFW fashion] that a weird reason that I kept following him had something unexplainable and very much in the back of my mind to do with how my head has been screwed up over DFW's suicide, and getting my ass kicked really didn't sound all that bad at 11:30 this morning) I kept following him and trying to annoy him by asking his name and making stupid small talk, making him painfully aware that I would follow him wherever he decided to go. And after a little bit of that, he eventually took the DVD's out of his cargo pocket and threw them over his shoulder, and I got them and went back to the store. And for the first time in a very very long time, I felt brave. And I felt good.

I have two days off starting tomorrow, and I'm hoping to get some laundry done, but other than that I don't know how to spend my time. Cleaning? Working on music? Running?

or E) All of the above?

More DFW

Haven't really known what to write. This DFW thing has messed with my head a little more than it probably should. Work for the past few days has been incredibly slow, so I've had about 6 hours a day to do nothing but stand around and think about it, and feel bad, and wonder, and be scared, and sad. I think that it's a pretty ludicrous reaction to the death of somebody you never knew, and I'm embarrassed to be writing it, but there it is.

I watched this yesterday, and it didn't help at all, but I'm glad I watched it. It's long, and it's from over a decade ago so there's a distance there, but I like it.



"What the really great artists do is: they're entirely themselves. They're entirely themselves, they've got their own vision, their own way of fracturing reality, and that if it's authentic and true you will feel it in your nerve endings." (27:08)

That's the last I'm gonna write about him, for now.

R.I.P. DFW

I just read that David Foster Wallace was found dead in his home on Friday night. Jesus fucking christ.

Let's Get Physics-cal!

Well, it's been over a week since I've written, but Jebus Christ, nobody else has been writing, either, so I don't wanna hear it. Thanks to OAA, who I can always count on to save my daily shit-checking regimen from being a complete wash.

Here's what's been happening:

1. Working with the J-Dog on her Physics. It's harder than I remember it being. It's really been a long time since I've had to do any math harder than say, well, addition. But we seem to be making progress.

2. I ran six miles the other day. And I've been telling Jeannie about it every day since. Pray for her.

3. My parents are coming out for a visit at the end of the month. We're going to drive to New Jersey and stay here. Hopefully it will turn out to be as enjoyable as their visit last year.

4. Jeannie found my toenails. And she was, as predicted, grossed out. And seemed a little pissed, despite the fact that she already knew, from reading this blog, that they were hidden somewhere. Sheesh!

5. There seem to be rotting tomatoes everywhere in our apartment.

6. The first stage of my secret project is done.

7. Work has been b o r i n g. But the holidays are looming with their dark, evil loominess.

8. J-Dog and I may go on a date tonight! Maybe dinner, maybe see the new Coen Bros. flick.

9. Gonna go give myself a haircut.

Alone

I'm spending the evening by myself tonight, as the Jeanners has a late night with her Physics class and then lab. So she won't be getting home 'til around 11 or so. A long day for her. So I'm sitting here, and I just finished a couple of veggie burgers for dinner, and I went for a run earlier, and now I'm a little bored. So I'm listening to Bill Evans' cd Alone and trying to find some inspiration somewhere. Inspiration for what, I'm not exactly sure. Just something to put a little bit of my energy (or what's left of it) into.

Lordy, Lordy, tonight I've decided that I really, really hate politics. I think it brings out the worst in people. And I think that I hate politics because at heart I prefer inaction to action. C'est la vie.

I've been reading a Kerouac book lately that I first read a long time ago and didn't like. Visions of Cody. When I first read it, it was pretty easy to dismiss as gibberish, but now I'm finding it to be really good. I think the key is that it's not meant to be read like a normal novel, it's meant to be read in a series of short (usually, luckily for me, bathroom-length) bursts. It doesn't really have much of a plot, it's more just a series of impressions. But they're very detailed, very richly described and perfectly written impressions. But then again, maybe I just haven't gotten to the part that sucks yet. I think it's gonna take me a long time to finish (hopefully I won't be bitching the whole way a la "Mason and Dixon"), and I might give up midway through, but I'm enjoying it for now. The original unedited scroll of On the Road recently was published in paperback and I'm interested in getting that...

Korn's last day at the B&N was Tuesday. She's headed off to Jersey to have a real life. I'm happy for her, and glad that she's taking steps in the right direction (away from the B&N), but I will miss her at work. The one rule of B&N: everybody leaves. Anyway, we had a good little gathering at the Rec Room where I had one goddamned tasty muthafuckin', juice-drippin' burger and kept my beer drinking under control so I didn't make an ass out of myself. Or at least no more of an ass than I usually am. I did drink a lot of Sprite though. Sprite is good!

Earlier this evening a good portion of our apartment smelled like Vicks Vap-O Rub. The smell seemed to be coming into the apartment from somewhere outside (?) (!!) I think it is one of the signs of impending apocalypse when your city starts smelling like Vicks.

This cd is not quite as moody as I thought it would be. But maybe I'm just not listening closely enough. It is pretty good, though.

Don't Let Me Into This Year With an Empty Heart

Jeannie and I got back last night from Caretaker Farm, which is in the northwestern corner of Massachusetts, outside a little town called Williamstown. We visited our friend Katie, who has been working as an intern on the farm since April, and will continue her internship until November, when she may return to Baltimore or continue farming.

I am not one to throw around superlatives lightly, and I am not really a touchy-feely, wishy-washy type guy, but I have to say that the place was really special and in a way, life-changing. I was really blown away by the friendliness, coolness, and quiet sense of pride and satisfaction that the small group of people who worked there seemed to have. And of course the place was beautiful.





We had planned on camping, but instead ended up staying in a common room for the 4 interns on the farm. It looked like this, and it was pretty cool:



The common room is built over the part of the barn where the pigs are kept, so at night while you're trying to sleep you can hear the pigs rustling around underneath you, as well as the mice scurrying around in the ceiling above you, and then in the morning the cows start mooing right outside the window once the interns start milking (also right below the common room).

It was a great trip, and wonderful to see Katie, who showed us around the beautiful area (the farm is located in the Berkshires), took us hiking, and introduced us to everybody and made us feel perfectly at home. The "visiting friends in interesting places for vacation" policy has once again proven itself to be a wonderful thing.



Last night on the way home Jeannie and I stopped at a cute little diner called the "Penn-Can" in, I believe, someplace called Birmingham, Pennsylvania. The place looked like someplace out of a Tom Waits song and served food that would have made the folks at Caretaker Farm wince -- all fried and greasy and guiltily delicious. It was a nice little truck stop type place.

Today the J-Dog and I spent a good part of the day studying physics for her class. Trying to get the basics mastered so the rest doesn't suck. I'm so glad I'm not in school anymore.

Into the Bush

Tomorrow morning J-Dog and I are leaving for our little end-of-the-summer mini-vacation, which will consist of us camping on a farm in Massachusetts. Please water our plants while we are gone.

While I was writing the title of this post, I was reminded of a dream I had the other night: In the dream, I was looking through a stack of old photos that my parents had from the 70's. It looked like my parents owned and operated a swanky nightclub in the 70's, because everybody was decked out in leisure suits and had big swanky collars and looked generally coked to the gills. And then as I was flipping through the stack of photos, I came across a picture of Ava Gabor's bush, and my mom said, "Oh, we'd better get rid of that one." That was my dream.

Over this past weekend, I must have been attacked by a swarm of some sort of industrial strength, mutant swamp mosquitoes, as I have about a hundred bites on my legs that have been itching fer days.

Loose Ends

Many things have been happening and jumping:

1. The most wonderful and amazing thing is that PKP and T is gonna have a baby! Woo-Hoo! I am excited by this news.

2. I got stung by a bee!

3. I went to court about a week and a half ago cause I got subpoenaed for the shoplifter. I didn't really have to do anything because the shoplifter sort of plead guilty. But court was boring and interesting at the same time. It was interesting to listen to other people's cases. It was also interesting to watch the State's Attorney, the Public Defender, and the Judge, all of whom seemed to know their jobs very well. It was funny because everyone talked VERY FAST all the time.

4. Jeannie and I are going out of town this weekend on a super-secret semi-impromptu-but-not-really vacation. We're gonna camp. Theoretically. Unless I wuss out and decide I want to stay somewhere with a hot tub.

5. I guess the Schluetermetz' should be arrivin' in Oregon right about now? Or soon?

6. Korn is moving away. Which makes me sad. But I'm happy for her because I think her life will be more exciting and interesting once she moves.

7. I ran 4 miles the other day.

Goodbye O, Hello O!

Well, in a few days, the Schluetermetz' will be leaving Ohio. Truly the end of an era. Poor Ohio, which I have long held to be the suckiest state in The Union, now has no redeeming qualities. And although I definitely have great memories of hanging with the cool kids in Columbus and Bellefountaine, I am feeling surprisingly un-sentimental about their upcoming move. I really think that the good times haven't even started yet, that the West will treat them well, and they will enjoy it. And we will enjoy visiting them.

Still though, I'm always a little sentimental, especially at nighttime, so I've uploaded a few songs about Ohio and one about (I think) Oregon and the Northwest. Looking back and looking ahead. Although I will admit that the Too Much Joy song "Goodbye Ohio" has little to do with Ohio, except the title. But the Damien Jurado is pretty damned good...

I stink.

Goodnight!

Just About 80 Percent...

...of the cd's I've bought in the last year have been jazz cd's. Do I like jazz more than pop these days? Jury's still out...


...of the atmosphere at the B&N tonight was composed of my farts.


...of my dinner was my own chest (I hope) hair.


There's a little bit of a chill in the air tonight. It feels good. I can feel a little breeze blowing across the floor onto my bare feet.

The Jeanners signed up to go back to school today (I'm very proud of her, and I told her so), and yet she strangely didn't want to rent Rodney Dangerfield's 1986 laugh-fest Back To School to get her in the mood (which saddens and disappoints me).

My Big Day, or The Year of the Roach

Yesterday was an important day, for two reasons:

1. It was my 31st birthday.

2. I fucking finished Mason and Dixon. And this is what I have to say:

a) Fuck that book. Fuck it in its A S S.

b) Fuck Thomas Pynchon for writing that book.

c) And finally, and definitely not least importantly, fuck BJ Gailey for recommending that book. Fuck him with a big fat cock. Or at least 2 medium-sized cocks. (Together, not one at a time).

Had a good, low-key birthday. Worked in the morning, went to the gym, went to dinner at a place in Little Italy [where, when the waiter came to take our plates, a cockroach scurried out from either on or underneath my plate. Woo-Hoo!], and then watched an episode of The Tudors while lounging in bed. The Tudors is still bad and nowhere near as good as Rome but damned if we aren't a little bit sucked in.

Spent a good portion of the day working on music and the rest of it on the phone with Verizon trying to fix our internet connection after it mysteriously stopped working. Every time they kept trying to transfer me to someone else, so I eventually hung up and somehow got the thing working myself. Or rather, it started working despite my efforts to screw it up even further.

Thanks for all the Facebook birthday wishes! Sorry for all the bad language!

Not Tired

It's starting to get late but I'm not tired. I mixed myself a big G&T when I got home from work this evening, and I'm still working on it. I've been reading through some old blog posts and realizing how glad I am that I've been keeping this here bloggy-blog. I don't look back at old posts too often, but when I do there's usually something back there that I don't remember writing that makes me smile.

I've been missing folks a lot lately. I listened to some Emmylou Harris at work the other night ("Sweet Old World"), and it made me miss Seanyboy. What it really made me do was look forward to one day having the songwriting visit that we talked about when I was visiting Alaska. We decided then that our next visit would be a songwriting visit rather than a recording visit. So I'm looking forward to that.

And I've been missing the Beej because he's leaving his podcast, and I feel like I haven't seen him in awhile, and I don't know when I'll see him next. Whenever I'm at work and I have nothing to do, I often feel the desire to call him up and shoot the shit. But I don't because A) Inevitably, as soon as I pick up the phone to call someone while I'm at work, 10 customers will walk into the department and I'll have to get off the phone and do my goddamn job, and B) BJ is a bitch and doesn't answer his phone.

And of course, the Schluetrmetz', cause they're moving and have some major changes coming up, and I wonder how our lives will intertwine in the future. Will we end up in the same place? Where is that place? What the fuck will we all be doing? I am beginning to realize that they have a profound effect on my phsyche: 1) I quit smoking after a visit to the Schluetermetz'. 2) I quit eating like a piggy after a visit to the Schluetermetz'. 3) I feel rejuvenated and creative after a visit with the Schluetermetz', and am somehow able to come home and start working on songs again.

Somehow they help me transition out of any ruts I might be traveling in...

(I have just hidden some toenail clippings somewhere in our living room for Jeannie or myself to find at some point in the future and be entirely grossed out. And now I've probably grossed you out, too. Sorry. But it seems like a fun game? No?)

And today I was playing on the guitar that Rich made for me, and I can't pick the damn thing up without wondering how he's doing, and I hope he's doing well. I hope that he gets a chance to come out and visit at some point this year. That reminds me, I need to send uncle Rico an e-mail and ask his advice...Rico is one of a kind.

And jeez, I've been missing people who live right down the damned road. I haven't really seen Pat all summer, haven't seen anybody from CSC, haven't hung out with A-Train. I think there's something inside me that hibernates during the summertime, and I don't know why, exactly. And I really hope that it is just during the summer, and that I'm able to come out of it during the fall, and get off my ass, and make the effort to go see people when I can.

I was listening to some of my songs on the way to work today, and I decided that my favorite line that's in any of them is a pretty simple one: "When will I see you again?"

So, when will I see you again?

Alright, I should go attempt some sleep. Eye doctor appointment tomorrow!

SMARTIES! Part Deux

Seriously, I think I have given myself diabetes with the number of SMARTIES that I have eaten in the last two days. When I was finished tonight at work, I had filled about half of a standard-sized office waste can with discarded SMARTIES wrappers. But dammit if they didn't make the night better.

I'm gonna go ahead and post the rough draft of this song I'm workin' on. The vocals are pretty much just gibberish I was singing so that I will remember a possible melody when I actually try to come up with real words. I think it's a good start, definitely similar to 'The Ring' but maybe different enough...we'll see what happens with it.

Do you want some golden fried jumbo shrimp? Or is it just me?

SMARTIES!

Had a good, productive day yesterday. Went to the gym, did some laundry, baked some cookies, made some dinner, and worked on some music that could turn into a pretty decent song. Now I just have to come up with a decent song. But I like the music, because the things that were "accidents" ended up being the most interesting things, and that's always fun.

Listened to BJ's last podcast today, and it made me kinda sad. I will miss my semi-weekly dose of the Beej.

Tonight work was so god-damned boring that I seriously wanted to kill myself. Then I ate about 15 rolls of SMARTIES and it got a whole lot better.

I am currently stuffing my face with some delicious popped corn and some even more delicious beer.

When I typed "popped corn" just now, I first accidentally typed "pooped corn." How silly. It won't be pooped corn 'til I eat it tomorrow night...

There Will Be Transvestite Shoplifters

I just finished watching There Will Be Blood. I liked it. Daniel Day Lewis is pretty awesome. The whole time I was watching the movie, I was picturing PKP in the Daniel Plainview role, though. I think Pat probably would have done just as good a job.

Went to the beach on Sunday. Hung out with folks from B&N down there. It was a good time, pretty laid back, relaxing. Nothing too outrageous. I got a little bit of a sunburn. I was pretty good about using the ol' sunscreen, though. But I guess I should have put some on my titties, cause that's where I got burned.

I got subpoenaed the other day. Turns out that I have to go be a witness 'gainst the shoplifter that I chased down at the B&N. Anyway, it'll be my first time in court. I hope Harry Anderson is the judge.

The Jeanners and I have been watching the epic western miniseries Lonesome Dove. One of my favorites. We just finished it the other night, and both had ourselves a good cry. If you've never seen it, for the love of Jebus, do yourself a favor and rent the sumbitch.

Thanks a lot, Kneser.

This has been in my head (and Jeannie's, too) for several days.



From Knese's Emergency Pudding.

Download That Shizzit!

NPR is streaming (and you can download it, too) a full Tom Waits concert (2.5 hours!) from Atlanta. Score! Get it HERE.

I have to say, I preferred his setlist in Columbus. In fact, I have yet to read a setlist on the tour that I liked more than the show he played in Ohio, mostly because of the inclusion of "Cold, Cold Ground" and "Time."

Not much else to report.

The Jeanners and I might be taking a semi-impromptu trip to the beach this Sunday. Which should be enjoyable because Korn and John and maybe Brian G. will also be down there.

Got the day off tomorrow. I think I shall bike to the gym, eat some eggs and black beans, and maybe work on music. Maybe not. I farted around on some music today, with not-very-good results, but may have turned up something that I want to go back and revisit later.

Oh, Shenandoah

Today the Jeanners and I went on a float trip on the Shenandoah River with people from her job. I have discovered over the past few days that apparently people here don't use the term "float trip" and have no idea what the hell it is. So, if you don't know, read the sentence after the following sentence. If you do know, you don't have to read it. A "float trip" is when you float down a river in some sort of boat (in this case, a canoe) or other floating device, such as a large inner tube. It might, perhaps, be necessary to note that a float trip should not be attempted with any sort of smaller inner tube, such as a bicycle inner tube. It just won't work. Unless you are an infant (or just infant-sized) and have the inner tube wrapped around you like two or three times. Which might hinder your enjoyment of said float trip.

One day I might want to look back on this day fondly, so for the benefit of my rapidly failing memory I will list the people who went on the float trip: Matt, Kedri, Rodney, Ian, Nancy, Melissa, Eugene, Miriam, and me and J-Dog.

For each of the past 2 days I have held a shit for longer than 8 hours.

Confidential to E. Elz regarding unicycles: When I was a kid, there was another kid who was a few years older than me (I think his name was Mike) who used to unicyle around the neighborhood. The kid was kinda weird, and he looked just like a platinum-blonde version of the kid from the "Rothsdower" MST3K movie.

Today we paid $3.74 for gas. I felt like it was 1982.

Drunk Bike Ride

I came home today from JT's going away party on my bike, and I was a little bit buzzed. And then, when I got close to home, it started raining real hard. It was pretty fun.

The last (and only other?) time I went drunk bike riding was with Sean back in Kirksville. I think we were just riding around Kirksville on some bikes of unknown origin ("borrowed"?) after having been at the Dukum for awhile. I think we ended up at the Schluetermetz' place.

Speaking of the Schluetermetz', Brad posted this video today which made me miss my friends. Also been thinking a bunch about (and missing) the Beej. Especially after having had a delicious burger at the Rec Room.

Summa-time

Not too much happening. Biking, running, going to the gym, hanging out, sweating. I biked to work a few days this week, which has been good, and will save on the ol' gas. I also got asked for money by a panhandler while I was speeding by him. That's a first.

It's been hot.

Last night I had a dream that I gave Matt Davis (from Truman) a backhand slap across the face because he was bothering me.

Wow, I just paused midpost to go take a poop!

A few days ago I downloaded a trial version of some Auto-Tune software so I can make my voice sound like T-Pain.

Hmmm. That's really about it. Today I'm going to a going away party for somebody at work and I'm gonna eat a delicious Rec Room burger and drink some beer.

You fools!

The last post was just a test. Now I know which of my friends are quitting pansies (PKP, RR, JS, EE), and which are tough like me (way to go, JK!). I'm gonna finish that goddamn book! And what's more, I'm gonna finish it by tomorrow night!






























Ok, I've thought it over, and that last part probably won't happen.

Decision Time

I am on page 599 of Mason and Dixon, but I haven't picked the book up in several weeks. I have 174 pages left to go. I took a break and read a Tom Waits biography, and then we went on vacation (and I brought the book but never opened it up), and then I just read Slaughterhouse Five because BJ's review of it on his podcast was so damned good. So now I am faced with the prospect of going back to M&D, which I really don't feel like doing, but I also don't feel like throwing away several months of my life only to NOT finish the book. What do I do?

In other news, the J-Dog and I biked to the garden the other night, and it was a good time. But then she took a spill on the way home. She's ok, but she's scraped up a bit. It was pretty scary.

I biked to the gym yesterday, which turned out to be a surprisingly simple ride, but hilly. And, because the gym is right next door to the B&N, I now know that I could bike to work, which is a nice option.

Time to go poo!

Finally

1. Finally done with 'the ring.' Seriously. I've checked the mix on every possible listening device that I have available to me. Done. Moving on...

2. Finally clocked in at under 180 lbs. today. For the first time in probably about 12 years or so.

3. Finally ran over 3 miles. For the first time in like, ever.

4. Finally got the bike (that we brought back from the Lou for me) up and running.

5. Finally (Saturday in the shower) decided on my two favorite words in the english language: ocean and raining.

Xtreme Bass

After listening in the car to the song I posted yesterday, I discovered that some of the low bass at the end is a little out of control. I'll have to fix that.

Urine Luck!

Outside of our bedroom window, it smells like pee. Which is imressive because we're three flights up. But problematic because we like to have a box fan in the window at night blowing clean, cool air across our sleeping bodies. So if you've been taking your before-bed leak down in our breezeway, please stop.

Yesterday I finished up "The Ring." This morning I checked the mix, and as of right now I am calling it finished. Check it out over in the sidebar.

I think I forgot to mention that Jeannie and I brought back some bikes from St. Louis. Her parents found an old bike that someone was throwing away in the alley behind their house, and it was still in good shape, and my parents had some old bikes from when us kids were, well, kids. So now we have bikes. I'm still waiting on some new tires and tubes that I ordered over the internet, but then we'll be in business. The J-Dog has been riding hers to work now instead of walking, and although the morning traffic is scary, I think she'll enjoy it. I don't know where I'll ride mine. I might eventually attempt to ride it to work, but I'll have to see how practical that would be.

We've watched 3 episodes of "The Tudors." Don't know if we'll get any more discs or not. It's just not nearly as good as "Rome" was, and that's disappointing.

Why Bother?

Haven't really felt like writing since we've been back. Probably because of the heat. So, for the majority of this post, I shall resort to using god's gift to those who don't really feel like writing: bullet points.

But first, I would like to post nearly worthless pictures and video from the Tom Waits concert. Jeannie and I got to Columbus, OH without a hitch, ate a decent Vietnamese dinner at what appeared to be a scary scary Vietnamese restaurant, and then went to the Ohio Theatre, which looked like this:


It was described thusly by the metal heads sitting behind us: "This place is awesome. It's like, bejeweled. It's like a Faberge egg."

The concert was very good, I thought. Not life-changing good, but pretty much just what I expected. I came out of the show having decided that if Tom Waits ever goes on a solo tour, no band, I would slaughter little children in order to get tickets. This is a very poor quality video of a little sliver of "Lie to Me":




Now for the bullet points:

* Tom Waits looks, from a very far distance, like a cross between Frankenstein's monster and the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz.

* Once again I was reminded: it's all about the bass, drums, and vocals.

* Though our stay in Ohio was quick, it was damned good to see the Schluetermetz'. Hard to believe that we'll probably never go back to good ol' Bellefountaine, OH again.

* There are certain St. Louis foods that Jeannie and I crave (Imo's Pizza, gyros from Olympia), but no Baltimore foods we crave. When we leave B-more, is there food that we'll crave? Crab cakes? Enchiladas with a fried egg on top?

* Hanging out with Rich Riley was one of those old fashioned, go-out-for-a-drink-and-get-a-little-tipsy-and-talk-about-life type nights the likes of which I haven't had in awhile. It was especially nice that Dressel's was nearly empty and quiet and playing Dixieland jazz.

* I like the new Coldplay cd, though I have mixed feelings towards Coldplay.

* I like the new cd by the Fleet Foxes. I think I could confidently recommend it to many people who read this blog.

* Adios!, Chuy Arzola's mexican restaurant!

* J. Knese, just by being himself, makes me laugh just about more than anybody I know. And I was truly surprised and bummed to hear about Casey's roller-derby induced broken arm.

* E. Elz makes me physically ill.

* "America's Best Value Inn" in Zanesville, OH is probably not really America's best value.

* I am overwhelmed by the gifts that Jeannie and I received while we were in St. Louis.

* "The Tudors" is not as good as "Rome". Not yet, anyway. We've only watched one episode.

* I indulged in beer and meat while I was in St. Louis, but now I am back on the starvation/exercise/misery wagon.

With a Little Help From My Friends

Still on the road. What a wonderful trip it's been. Don't really have the time to write a big post, but I wanted to give a shoutout to Uncle Rico. Thanks for hanging out with the J-Dog and I last night, Buddy. I've been picking around today with Whitey. He looks and feels great. And I can't wait to get home and try out the Pod. Reading the users manual makes me believe that this is the piece of equipment that I have been longing for but have been too lazy to get off my arse and actually look for.

Next round of beers is on me...

More once we get home.

"Hash browns, hash browns, you know I can't be late..."

Tomorrow: A trip to St. Louis with a stop in Ohio to see the Schluetermetz' and Tom Waits.

What a great sentence to write.

More from the road...

Cause I Look Really Good Bald...

...was the answer given to me today by a mentally challenged customer when I asked him why he shaved his head. For the record, however, he does not look as good as me bald. Not by a long shot.

Not too much has been going on. Working out a lot. Running a lot. Not eating a lot. Feeling good. Thinking a lot about music but not actually doing more work. Haven't touched the song that still needs a lot of work, but I might have come up with a very basic idea for a new one. We shall see.

Saw a picture today on Facebook of all the cool kids in Chicago, and it looked like a good time. Sure would've been fun to head to Chicago on a road trip to see the play and catch up with Bewley, but alas, the timing was just slightly wrong. Sure hope the Schluetermetz' write about how it went...(hint, hint)

Tomorrow, my goal is to go to Sherwin-Williams and buy me some aluminum roof coating and paint our roof a nice, shiny, reflective silver so as to try and drop the average temperature of our apartment by a few degrees this summer. I'm looking forward to getting up on the roof and rockin' out to some Tom Waits in the ol' headphones and gettin' a little sun and having some fun.

This week, by the way, is my "Tom Waits Immersion" week. In preparation for the concert (this weekend!), I have been reading a good biography, listening to all his cd's (at first, alphabetically by song, but I listened all day on Friday and only got up to the E's! So I switched to chronologically. And I'll probably skip over some of The Black Rider. Sorry, Tom.), and gettin' myself all pumped up. I'm very excited.

I haven't had any booze or bacon since June 1st! Who are you and what have you done with the real Dan O'Brien?

On and On It Goes

I spent nearly all day yesterday working on some music, and I'm pretty pleased with the results. And, more importantly, Jeannie seemed to like it, too. It's not finished yet, I still have to re-record all the vocals and add the last verse and chorus and ending and all that jazz, but I think it's a promising start. I'll just go ahead and put it over there on the sidebar...

Have a day off tomorrow, during which I hope to go to the gym, get laundry done, and maybe play a little Civilization III, which I haven't played in about a bazillion years. But I saw the CD-ROM for it the other day when I was fishing in my desk drawer for something, and it put me in the mood.

In the past 10 minutes, I have consumed:

1. One Cheeserito Just Cheese.
2. About 15 strawberries.
3. 3 dill pickle chips.

I'm wondering if eating fruit right before bed is gonna keep me awake.

Thaings for dooing sumthing you dont wunt to do.

Also not in my job description:

chasin' transvestite shoplifters all over the parking lot and traffic circle.


Long story that can pretty much be summed up in that one sentence.

It's good to be home. I'm gonna have a G&T.

Not Too Shabby

It's been a few days since I've written, and I have to say, things have been going pretty well during that time. The diet is still going strong; I still have yet to eat any meat (despite my proclamation that I was going to be eating some [I forgot to defrost the bacon]), and I've lost about 6 or seven pounds in the last week and a half or so. I'd like to lose another ten.

But anyway, I feel good. Much less like a tub of shite. Work has been good, easy, and I've had too many people scheduled which means I don't spend all day by myself, I actually get to hang out with people, which is nice.

It's been alternating between balls-ass hot and just warm. On the balls-ass days, the Jeanners and I turned on the window unit in the bedroom and camped out in there. Played some gin rummy.

The Tom Waits concert is only two weeks away!

Been doing some tentative, hesitant song writing, and it's felt good. I think that, in accordance with my new "write the song before you record it" guideline, I'm going to work on songs with the idea that I should be able to play it live. Maybe even go to some (shudder) open mic nights on the down-low. Who knows. Maybe not.

The other day at work, Chris asked me what my favorite Tom Waits album is, and what my favorite TW song is. It was tough to answer, but I've recently discovered a version of a song that I think encapsulates everything that I like about him. So I'll go ahead and post it over there on the side...

A day off tomorrow. Chores, and maybe some recording. Wish gas weren't so damned expensive or I'd consider heading to the beach...

Happy Birthday, PKP! I may take you up on your omelet offer.

It's Finally Here!

Yippie! It's finally arrived! The day of the year when it gets balls-ass hot in our apartment is really here!

So yeah, it's getting pretty derned hot here in B-More. Which is bad because it's uncomfortable but good cuz then the J-Dog hangs around with less clothes on.

The diet is still going well. Tomorrow morning I'm planning on eating the first meat that I've eaten since last Sunday morning. And that includes cock-meat!

Work has been feeling painful lately...

I've been thinking ahead to eventually moving away from Baltimore, and also thinking ahead about potential future employment, and right now the only job that seems halfway tolerable would be breakfast cook at a diner. It would be funnier if it wasn't true. (sigh).

Pinch a muthaf***in' inch

I am finally, FINALLY starting to shake the disease I picked up from Jack/Henry Steinmetz. Damn those Steinmetz kids and their immune-system-resistant viral strains.

However, thanks to Schlueter and all the fruit that she fed us while we were visiting, I have been on a diet since we got back to Baltimore. Eating a lot less, eating a lot of fruit, more veggies, etc. In fact, I'm hungry right now. That's gotta be a good thing, right? I think I can feel my six pack starting to poke out a little bit...

I am so very very tired of advertisements where they take half of one person's face and put it next to the other half of a different person's face and it makes a single, really f***ed up-looking single face. I'm really tired of those.

I am pleased to announce that "Operation Buy a Used Broken MP3 player on E-bay and Use the Parts to Fix My Broken MP3 Player - 2008" was a success. So my good ol' music player is working great again and it only cost me twenty bucks.

I was listening to the Tom Waits song "Time" the other night on my way home from work, and I think I stumbled on the idea that will guide me through my next round of recording: write the songs first, and then try and record them. I don't know why this always seems to be the opposite of how I work, but I think I need to focus more on the words and less on the music.

Oh, and I don't know if y'alls read my friend Jeff's blog (which is great in and of itself, although he hasn't written in a few days), but he links to this blog about Ice-T and his wife, which is very funny. Although it has occasional semi-sorta nudity, so you might not want to view it at work. Check it out.