Who's the Boss?

 Last night's dream:  Jeannie and I hired Bruce Springsteen to de-clutter our house. 

Bristol 7

 Tonight, a new expression was created, one that I will pass down to my children and that they, in turn, will pass on to their children.  And that expression is "Bristol 7."  And it means diarrhea.  

You see, like many families, we keep a copy of the Bristol Stool Chart on our refrigerator.

And the other night Samuel and I were looking at it and I asked him what his poop is like and he said 3's and 4's.  And I (jokingly) told him that mine were all 7's.  

And I don't know how it came up, but tonight at dinner we were talking about diarrhea and I referred to it as a "Bristol 7," and now I absolutely fucking love that expression.  

"I ran into the gas station and did my business and it was a straight Bristol 7."

"I missed work last week because I was stuck in Bristol 7's."

Plus, because nobody knows what it means, you can totally insult people without them knowing it:

"Damn!  You look like a Bristol 7 today, girlfriend!"

"Thanks for the lovely evening.  I haven't had a time like this since my last Bristol 7."

Anyway, I think you get the idea.  Enjoy it.  Have fun with it.  If you come up with a great Bristol 7 expression of your own, leave it in the comments!