Saturday, December 29, 2012

Mayans Lie

The Jeanners and I are back home after spending a few days in St. Louis for Christmas.  It is good to be home, good to have Sam back somewhere familiar where there's room to stretch out a little bit, and time to take him outside, and time to just sit and play and have life get back to normal.  The traveling and X-mas parties and such really threw off his schedule and he was waking up in the middle of the night, ready to start his day, and just made him a little bit crazy.  Which made Jeannie and I pretty exhausted for a lot of the trip (except for when Jeannie's Mom took Sam for a few hours and I got to take the greatest 4-hour nap of my life.  Seriously, it was the nap that I've been waiting to take ever since the little Dude's been born.), and a little crazy, too.

Work ended up being not too damned bad this year, probably the most pleasant holiday season I've ever had there.  No real pain-in-the-ass customers, adequate # of people scheduled, etc.

My favorite parts of the Christmas break were:  getting to spend some time with Jerns' brother and Grandma, both of whom were staying at Jeannie's folks' house, hanging out with E. Elz and J. Knese sans Sam and feeling a little bit like the hip adult that I no longer am, and chatting with some nieces and nephews about relationships and how generally sucky it is to be in your twenties and faced with some life decisions that seem to be (and I guess are) monumental and life-defining.  Anyway, I do not envy any of them right now, and I'm glad my twenties are over and that I made a few big choices back then and that the choices seem to be working out pretty well.

Katie the World Traveler will be at our home soon, fresh from the wilds of Africa.  It'll be good to catch up and see the girl again after an absence of a few months.

It feels good to be home!  I don't even mind being up before 6 this morning because I am up before 6 in my own damned home!

Saturday, December 22, 2012


The Jeanners left town yesterday morning, early, in a mess of holiday travelers at the airport, and it's quite a story.  But it's her story, so I'll let her have the opportunity to tell it if she wants to.  I'll just give this teaser trailer:  picture the J-Dog running through a packed BWI airport, with no shoes or belt, carrying Sam, trying to get to her gate.  At like 6:30 in the morning.

Anyway, so they're gone, and I am stuck here tending the home fires.  Been at work yesterday and today, and it's been super-busy, but really no Christmas-ruining moments or anything.  I haven't blown up and cussed out my boss this year or anything.  And I gave my co-workers their Christmas presents and they all seemed to like them.  Especially the hypercolor t-shirts I got my boss and another co-worker.  I'm pretty happy with those gifts.

So last night after work I passed the time by wrapping presents and giving myself a haircut.  Tonight I installed our fireplace doors (went relatively smoothly).  Tomorrow after work it's clean house and pack clothes.  Monday is work and then flight to St. Lou and then Jeannie's family's Christmas party.  It'll be nice to see the Jeanners and the Little Dude.  Tonight when I got home from work I went to hang up my coat and I saw his little red jacket hanging on the hook and it made me miss him.  Although last night I was looking forward to having a Sam-less night of uninterrupted sleep and sleeping in (until 7:15).  But I still ended up waking up at 3 in the morning and then again at 5, thinking that I was hearing him.  I wasn't.  Although when I talked to Jerns on the phone tonight she said that Sam's schedule was all sorts of screwed up and that he ended up waking up this morning at like 3 in the morning.  Ugh.  I hope he is a little closer to normal by the time I get to St. Louis.

I think that's all I've got.  Another busy day tomorrow, I'm sure.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like St. Patrick's Day

Well here it is, a week before Christmas and it's like 60 degrees and sunny and moist.   Very spring-like.  I'm about to take a walk to the liquor store with Sambone.  I love taking little kids to liquor stores.  I don't know why, exactly.  But it's not as bad as it sounds, because in Baltimore you can't really buy any alcohol (beer, wine, anything) except at a liquor store, with very few exceptions.  So it's not like I can just run down to Schnucks and pick up a six pack.  So off to the liquor store we go.  And geez, this time it's not even for me, it's for a co-worker's X-mas present.  So get off my back, already!

So anyway, it's really eerie not having any winter weather, like, ever, but I guess I might as well take the little dude outside and enjoy it a bit.  I've been working more day shifts at work lately and so there have been more days where I haven't gotten to spend much time with the dude, so it's been nice to hang out with him today.  And I've gotten a bunch of laundry done and some cleaning done so that after we leave town and come back we're not coming back to a place that is dirty and shitty, which is always a downer after the holidays. 

We got our fireplace doors the other day!  Woo-Hoo!  Just in time for the 60 degree days of winter.  Now I just have to install them.  Should I try and install them while Jeannie and Sam are out of town this weekend (which will be easier because there will be less baby around when the hammer-drilling is occurring) or should I do it sometime when Jeannie is here so that she can talk me out of suicide when I get in over my head and screw everything up? 

Alright.  I should really go pay attention to the kid over there. 

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Laser Light Show

Jeannie and I have changed our schedules such that she now goes in to the office on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, and then I go into work on Thursday night.  So I'm finishing up the third day in a row of hanging with the little dude and I have to say, I'm a little bored.  Not that there isn't literally tons of stuff that I could be doing (literally - if you wrote down everything productive that I could possibly be doing on its own little scrap of paper, and then put all of those scraps of paper in a Rubbermaid [TM] tub, that Rubbermaid [TM] tub would weigh one ton), but it's just that all of the things I could be doing are 1000 times more difficult to do while watching a child than they would be if I wasn't watching a child.  So I think to myself, "Oh, I'll just hang out here with the kid, and then I'll do __________ when Jeannie's home and I don't have to watch the kid."  Except that whenever Jeannie's home I just want to hang out and play with her, so nothing ever gets done.  And I'm bored. 

Anyway, nothing too exciting going on.  Did some Christmas shopping, although I did most of my Christmas shopping this year either online or over the phone. 

The Jeanners heads to St. Louis a week from tomorrow, and then I'll be following a few days after that.  It'll be another quick trip this year, but hopefully we'll get to see everybody we want to see. 

The other night in bed I put on a laser light show with two flashlights.  It was OK. 

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Sorry, Mom and Dad

I would just like to say that I'm not normally the type of person who uses the expression "cocksucker" lightly in public.  And even though my mind is very often a filthy cesspool, I try and keep that shit to myself amongst those with whom I am not very closely acquainted.  

I blame the lack of sleep.  Which, by the way, seems to have been solved by two Nyquil-filled nights. 

Oh, and shit doesn't really count as a bad word anymore, does it? 

Saturday, December 08, 2012

I would like to catch up on sleep, you cocksuckers.

You know, I thought that once the kid started sleeping through the night that life would get rosy again and I'd never feel sleepy again.  But it turns out that because he wakes up every day sometime between 4 and 5 in the morning, I'm just as tired now as when he was waking up at 2 in the morning and then going back to sleep until around 7 or so.  Damn you, baby boy!

Here's what I want:  elves watch the baby for about 2 days, Jeannie goes away (if she was here I would want to hang out with her.  Plus, her incessant coughing has been keeping me awake), and I sleep for 2 days.  I think 2 days would do it.  Get me caught up.  I just need a little catch up.  Probably I should just go to bed right now. 

Everybody's been sick lately, especially Jeannie, and me only a little bit.  It's felt like for about 4 days now that I was about to get sick, but then I never actually get sick.  Just sinus pressure in the head and a little congestion and the hint of a sore throat in the mornings.  Jeannie had the full blown thing with running nose and coughing and bleagh and blarg (meaning just general crappiness).  Sam had runny runny with big snot bubbles coming out of his nose when he laughed or breathed. 

Work has not gotten shitty yet, but shittiness is looming on the horizon, like a flock of crows ready to take a collective dump on the windshield that is my work life. 

Weird thing is that I've actually been having trouble sleeping when it comes time to make sleepy sleepy.  I get into bed and start thinking about too many things, and I have the damned Travolta/Newton-John christmas CD running through my head.  Ugh. 

Enough for now.  Bastante. 

I'm now going to send my mom an e-mail with a video of my kid taking a bath. 

Monday, December 03, 2012

The Lord of the Danneriliion (or, There but not Back Again)

I am currently in the midst of re-reading a bunch of JRR Tolkien stuff.  Haven't read it since I was about 12 or 13.  Reading The Hobbit at work and The Silmarillion at home.  Enjoying them both.  It's pretty amazing how different his 3 major works are (those 2 plus the Lord of the Rings), and yet they all tell different parts of the same massive story.  Quite a body of work.  I think that the Silmarillion is my favorite.  Very lush and poetic storytelling.  Not much dialogue.  Pretty much my favorite type of writing.  I remember when I was a kid reading books I would pretty much skip any paragraph that looked like it might be descriptive, and just jump to the dialogue.  Now I'm essentially the opposite.

Also, and I know I'm about 3-5 years late on this, I have started using Spotify, which is pretty danged awesome.  I'm a little curious about how it's NOT going to prevent anyone involved in music from making any money.  Or at least prevent people involved in music from making the gobs of money that they 1) used to make 2) might have one day made 3) dream of making one day.   Still, as a listener, it's pretty danged awesome. 

The Sambone has a bit of a cold.  Poor little dude.  [He's still in a pretty decent mood, though, although I'm currently starving him a little bit to try and wait until Jeannie gets home to feed him.  Cause I know she'll be ready to feed him when she gets home and that way she won't have to pump.  I hope she's not mad at me for revealing the secret that she sometimes pumps milk out of her breasts in order to feed our young baby.]

If she is mad at me, I might erase the bracketed text, along with this and the next sentence.  If I do have to erase it, I will replace it with this sentence:

"Well, that's all I've got right now.  Gotta poop!" 

Monday, November 26, 2012

Terders and faerts

If I had a time machine right now, and could travel to any time or place I desired, I would go back in time and not eat whatever is was that I ate that is making my farts smell like this. 

You should feel bad for me because, for about a day and a half, I have had several songs from the new John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John Xmas CD stuck in my head.  Specifically, "This Christmas," and "Baby It's Cold Outside" (which somehow manages to sound, simultaneously, exactly the same as every other version of "Baby It's Cold Outside" you've ever heard AND worse than every other version of "Baby It's Cold Outside" you've ever heard). 

My son has started making solid turds.  It's weird.  I know I should be happy about this because it means that he's healthy, and he's processing solid food well and able to move it through the ol' alimentary canal well, but it really makes me kinda sad.  It's almost a little too adult, like he's started carrying a little briefcase around or reading the Wall Street Journal or something.

Work, so far, has been not-too-bad this holiday season.  The worst is yet to come. 

I just want to go on record as saying autumn seemed especially long and especially beautiful this year.  It also seems like it's almost over. 

I just Googled 'alimentary canal' to make sure I was using it correctly.  It's been a long time since grade school science class and I've forgotten a lot.  Turns out, though, that I'm a fucking genius on this one. 

I also just Googled 'genius' because it looked funny. 

I'm off work tomorrow.  I will be babysitting Dr. Babykins, however, so I'm not planning on doing anything productive or exciting.  I am merely planning on having a fun day with my little dude, maybe going for a walk, singing some songs, doing some standing, having some "play-by-your-fucking-self" time, and of couse meals and naps. 

Also considering buying Christmas lights!  Multicolored ones if I can find 'em. 

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Quadriplegic Dogs of the Snowlands

If you were trying to find pictures of dogs that had skis for legs (or skids) you might try typing the title of this post into Google (or the search engine of your choice).  Or you might not.  Anyway, we tried it last night and we were unable to find any pictures of dogs with skis for legs.  They must be out there.  It was pretty easy finding pictures of dogs with wheels for legs, though.

Had a good time with Beej and Aimee last night, although Abby couldn't make it.  We ended up not playing any games, though, just eating some very average food and talking a lot and drinking drinks and then talking about "getting Snood."  I got a little bit tipsy, but comfortably tipsy.  I wasn't falling over or anything and I didn't wake up with a hangover.  Which is good, because Sam was up at his usual 6am and HE WILL NOT TOLERATE ANY HUNGOVER PLAYMATES.  Do not test him on this point. 

Tomorrow is Turkey Day, and the Jeanners and I have no real plans, just lots of little stuff we'd like to do.  We will be missing the Ohio crew and Uncle Rico.  Haven't talked to Rico in awhile, and I hope he is doing well.  Hopefully we'll be able to catch up at Christmastime in St. Lou.

I've been playing a little bit of Super Mario Bros. 2 lately.  I never played it very much as a kid.  I'm not very good at it.  In fact, I'm downright bad.  But you know what?  There are lots of other things that I'm ok at so I don't feel too bad about it.  I could probably beat you at ping-pong so shut up. 

Now I'm in a bad mood.  Thanks a lot.  Happy Thanksgiving. 

Monday, November 19, 2012

Prepping for the Beej

Tomorrow night A-Train, the Beej and his betrothed, Abby, are coming over for a dinner of pizza (or some other carryout food), and games.  I am tres excited about this.  Tres means "very" in Franch.  I like to say "Franch" more than "French" because it is more fun.  Sometimes I ask Sam if he wants to French kiss.  And then I go in for a French but he doesn't do anything.

Tomorrow I have to give myself a haircut.  I also have to clean the bathroom.  I also have to go to the grocery store and buy tonic, Coke, Sprite, eggs, and some sort of snack chip.  Also have to go to the liquor store and buy gin and beer.   I also have to sweep some areas of the floor in our house, most especially the bathroom floor, the hallway, and our bedroom.  Originally, cleaning the kitchen was on my list of things to do tomorrow, but the J-Dog cleaned the kitchen while I was at work tonight.  She has earned my love for another week or so. 

Sam went like 4 days without pooping.  He is normally a pretty regular guy, so I was worried when he went like 4 days without pooping. 

Awhile ago I wrote about a lung issue that I was having.  I am happy to report that the lung issue seems to have gone away.  I haven't had to use the inhaler for about 2 months now.

I gotta poop, and it's getting so I can't think straight because of it.  So I'm gonna do us both a favor and stop writing now. 

Monday, November 12, 2012

To Be Young, Gifted, and Black

In a few minutes it will be the J-Dog and my 8th anniversary.  Woo-Hoo!  Happy Anniversary to us! 

We are not really going to be doing anything special for this one.   The Jeanners is working tomorrow, and I'm taking Sam over to the CSC offices while I have a meeting with Ian about lighting in the new building.  Then we're tentatively planning on getting some carryout from Koco's for dinner. 

One thing we did do yesterday, that was not officially anniversary-related but does fit in nicely with the idea of us getting something nice for ourselves, was buy some adult furniture.  Adult furniture where the different pieces match each other.  Pretty crazy shit.  But anyway, our front room, which hitherto had been pretty much just a storage room for baby equipment, is starting to look like a real live living room.  It's looking like this:

Imagine me rubbing your feet and playing guitar while you lay on the couch and a fire burns slowly in the fireplace behind our new fireplace doors (not pictured) and we eat nachos.  Actually, we're gonna try not to eat while we're on the furniture, because pretty much everything I eat has either tomato sauce or salsa in it, and it is impossible for me to eat anything without spilling some on myself or the world around me. 

Sam has turned into a pretty decent sleeper.  He's been going to bed around 6-6:30pm and sleeping until around 4:30 or 5am.  It's pretty awesomefor Jeannie and I to have the evening to ourselves, although his early bedtime does cut into our cocaine and sex party routine. 

I think that's all I got.  The title of this post was taken from a Nina Simone song that has been in my head because we've been listening to the Meshell Ndegeocello cover at work.  She also does a cover of Leonard Cohen's "Suzanne" that is pretty awesome.

Friday, November 09, 2012

Sordid Butt Juice Chanting

I went, last night, to a movie.  At the theater, by myself.  An 8:45 show that got out around midnight.  Jeez, I haven't done that in, like, a million years!  First of all, I never go to movies.  Second of all, when I do go to movies I go with the J-Dog.  Third of all, I am usually in bed by midnight.  But anyway, I went to see Cloud Atlas, which is based on a book of the same name which I had read and enjoyed, and its scope is epic enough that I wanted to see it on the big screen.  I'm glad I went.  While there are parts of the movie that weren't great, and they changed some of the stuff in the book to make it a little bit more cheesy and Hollywood, I still enjoyed it.  And although the movie is close to 3 hours long, there was only about 10 minutes or so where I was feeling like things were getting too long.  And the air was crisp and cool as I walked out of the theater to my car, and I don't know, it just felt nice to be out on my own doing something. 

I am on the second of two days off with young Samuel, after having worked 7 busy days in a row getting stuff set up at work for Christmas.  The hurricane screwed up some of the prep time for the Christmas set-up, so I had to cram about a week's worth of work into 3 days.  Which is why the days were busier than usual.  Anyway, it feels good to be off, and it's been fun hanging out with Sam, and he's currently sitting in the high chair playing peacefully by himself.  Which is the best thing in the world. 

Been feeling weirdly emotional lately, kinda like I need to sit down and cry for about an hour.  But not in a bad way.  More like a "my-life-feels-pretty-damned-perfect-and-I'm-scared-to-lose-it" kinda way.  Pretty much the exact opposite of zen.  Ugh.  I don't know how to be zen and have a kid. 

Jeannie and I made a list of a lot of the stuff that we need to get done on the house.  I will tell you that it is a very long list. 

The diet is going pretty well.  I feel like I'm losing weight but still eating somewhat reasonably and not starving myself.  One good thing for aiming for 1500 calories a day or less is that even if you miss, you still end up under 2000 calories a day. 

The title of this post comes from old refridgerator magnet poetry that hasn't been on our fridge for probably 3.5 years. 

Thursday, November 01, 2012

My Mushroom Cap

Here's a picture of Jeannie and Sam on his first Halloween. 

Jeannie spent about 70% of the three days that we were at home together working on the damn things.  She was having so much fun.  It was nice to see her getting so much enjoyment out of a little project like that. 

Going back to work yesterday su-hu-ucked.  Catching up on 3 days worth of shipments, 3 days worth of customers, and trying to get ready for Christmas was no good.  Plus, I was in a little bit of Sam n' Jeannie withdrawal. 

So anyway, Sam's got a little bit of a cold right now, and he's a little more pukey than usual, so we've just been spending a normal day at home (although we did walk up to Harvest Fare earlier and buy a variety of soup products).  We've got a branch in the back that needs to get cut up, but I probably won't do it today because it's still a bit rainy and damp and gross.  Although, we're in November now, so it's probably gonna be that way for awhile. 

Time to do some dishes.

Monday, October 29, 2012

4th of July, Asbury Park (Sandy)

Hurricane Sandy is having its way with our front yard right now.  Actually, it hasn't been too bad yet.  We still have power (knock on wood), and its just been windy as hell and rainy as hell.  I think the worst is still to come, though.  And they seem to be getting hit a bit harder to the north, in New Jersey land and New York. 

The Nobes was closed today, so I had the day off work (I was supposed to go in tonight at 5), although I did go to my doctor's appointment this morning.  Everything on the ol' bod-ola is lookin' pretty danged good, I must say.  Although I've put on 3 lbs since February.  My guess is that if I hadn't been dieting recently it would've been more like 5-8 lbs. 

Wow, that was big gust of wind that just gusted. 

Today I saw for the first time trees swaying at the trunk.  Like, big trees.  Kinda spooky. 

Dinner making time.  

Friday, October 26, 2012

6 Long Months

The little guy turned 6 months today.  Celebrated by passing an absolutely normal day.  Which really, if I think about it, isn't that bad. If I spent all my birthdays playing, eating, sleeping, shitting, and only occasionally crying, I'd consider myself a lucky man.  But this evening it seems like he might be coming down with a cold, and it seems like Jeannie might be, too (I heard her sneeze in the bedroom after I got home from work and was in the kitchen making myself a G&T), and to be honest, I've had a bit of a tickle in the ol' throat for a day or two as well. 

So they're saying that the East Coast is about to get slammed by a storm the likes have which has never been seen by man or beast, and I'll be honest, I'm a little scared.  I don't like storms.  I don't like the fact that we have big, old trees in our yard that drop branches when I cut a big fart.  I don't like having to cut up said branches after they are dropped.  And I don't want our cars, home, or son to get smashed by any stupid branches.  So, I'll probably spend the storm cowering in the basement wearing earmuffs. 

Had a meeting with the architects, theatrical consultants, and electrical engineers yesterday about the new theatre.  Didn't get the answers I wanted to hear about several semi-major issues.  Hmmmm.  Must come up with brilliant, million-dollar ideas to solve the issues. 

What else?  I really am looking forward to Sunday, when both Jeannie and I are off work, and we'll all get to hang out as a family, and hopefully the boy won't be sick and hopefully the storm won't be storming and the branches won't be dropping and we'll all be safe and warm and dry. 

Monday, October 22, 2012

Secaucus just below Zebellybutton.

I must've made that joke about 20 times as we drove through Secaucus, NJ yesterday.  I'm often surprised that I'm not divorced.

We were on our way to NYC to visit the Schluetermetz' while they were in town with their play, North.  It was pretty exciting to be driving into Manhattan, getting closer and closer to the theatre and realizing that it was in a really great part of town, a great location, close to Central Park and between Madison Ave. and Park Ave.

Sam is laying next to me right now, either cutting some long overdue farts or dropping the shit-bomb that we've been expecting for the last 2 days.

Anyway, the theatre is in a great spot, and we met Brad and Jen there and then headed over near Central Park and got some lunch, then spent the rest of the afternoon walking and lounging around the park.  It was a great day, but I wish we would've had more time.  I wish we had been staying overnight so we would've had time to visit and see the play (it sounds like things have changed and become more refined since I last saw it a few years ago) and have dinner go out for drinks and do more fun New York-type stuff.  Oh well.  Next time.

I have to go take a shower and get ready for work!  Immediately!

Friday, October 19, 2012

Crack Cocaine-ifier

Yesterday was a pretty terrible day.  The Jeanners and I have been trying to break Sam of his pacifier habit, and he's completely addicted to it.  So he didn't sleep very well the night before, and he didn't sleep very well yesterday.  And neither she nor I had slept very much for the previous few nights.  So it was no fun.  And then at the end of the afternoon he took a big shit (the biggest I've seen to date) which leaked out of his diapers and all over the inside of his clothes.  When I took off his diaper to change him, the diaper was wall-to-wall poop, from front to back.  I used about 1/2 a package of wipes. 

But then, miraculously, last night Jeannie and I had a date, and it was really really nice.  We've had tickets for awhile to go see Mike Birbiglia, and he was funny even though he did all of the same material that we had already heard on the radio and made us like him in the first place.  And we went to Ban Thai for dinner before the show, which really is one of my favorite places in Baltimore for a date-dinner.  Plus, Nyoka was babysitting, and we both know and like Nyoka, and Sam knows Nyoka, so we were able to go out and not worry and forget for a few hours that we have a kid who, at the moment, just for the day, was a pain in the ass. 

We are going to be buying fireplace doors and I am super-psyched.  I hope they are not too hard to install.  But once we've got 'em and it gets cold I am gonna be lightin' fires like a mofo. 

Anyway, today's been going a lot better than yesterday.  I should really take this opportunity (the opportunity of Sambone taking a nap, that is) to go make some breakfast. 

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

For Those Keeping Score

The boy likes:  squash and bananas and maybe oatmeal. 
The boy does not like:  apples.  Or at least he doesn't seem to. 

Today I've been working on getting him to kick the pacifier habit.  The first nap was pretty rough, and it took about an hour of crying before he would fall asleep.  The second nap was better and it only took about 10 minutes, although it seems like he's waking up from that one and it's only been about 45 minutes. 

Oh well, enough about baby boy. 

The Jeanners and I were awake last night in the middle of the night because Sam was being a little bitch, and we got to lay around talking and laughing and stuff.  It was nice.  Felt a little bit like courtship, in a way.  I both hope that we get to do it again sometime and I also hope that we don't get to do it again sometime, or at least that maybe we could do it again at, like, 11pm rather than 3am. 

We've got a date on Thursday night and then a trip to NYC to see the Schluetermetz' on Sunday.  So much to look forward to...

Friday, October 12, 2012

Lose Weight Fast!

I'm currently on a little bit of a diet.  Here's what my daily intake has been for the last few days:

1.  1 Cup of cooked black beans, salted.  About 2 Tbs of salsa.  3 fried eggs.  All mashed up in a bowl.  About 550 calories.

2.  1 protein bar.  About 250 calories.

3.  One package of Trader Joe's pulled chicken in BBQ sauce.  420 calories. 

Plus a lot of water.  And 20-30 sit-ups every morning and night.  When I put on weight, it's all in my gut. 

Anyway, who knows if it's working yet.  But I feel like it's working.  My belly doesn't feel quite so pregnant-feeling. 

Things have been going well.  The dude continues to sleep through the night, although every now and again he yells and one of us has to get up and pop his pacifier back in his mouth until he falls back asleep.  But that is so much easier than having to get up and either feed him or try and rock him back to sleep or just hang out with him while he's wide awake in the middle of the night. 

The Jeanners and I are planning to head up to NYC for the day on the 21st to hang out with the Schluetermetz' while they are there for their play, which is getting some really great reviews.  I hope their ticket sales are doing well and that the whole project is a tremendous success.  It sounds like they've put beaucoup work into it, so I hope it all ends up being worth it. 

One time when I had to go to the bathroom I said to Sam, "Daddy's gotta take a shit."  Jeannie was there, too, and we all had a good laugh about it.  It's become one of my favorite things to say.  I'm really going to miss saying stuff like that when he learns how to talk. 

Oh, speaking of --  when Jeannie got home from work yesterday, Sam got real excited (he gets excited every time she gets home - it's very cute) and totally said "MAMA."  Jeannie and I did a take to each other and laughed, and then he said it again.  Then he started going "MAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMA," so we figured it was just a coincidence (plus, he's been doing it all day today and I've been the only one here), but still, it was pretty fun. 

Monday, October 08, 2012

Everyone You Meet is Jammin' in the Street...

...All Night Long.

That is how long Sam is now sleeping, and it is awesome.  I don't want to jinx it or anything, but he seems to have started sleeping from about 7:30 at night until around 5 in the morning, with a little fussing usually around 10 or 11pm.  Again, let me repeat, this is awesome.

Life has felt really good for awhile now.  There seems to be many things coming up in the near future to look forward to.  I'm looking forward to heading up to NYC to visit with the Schluetermetz' and introduce them to Sam.  I found out tonight that I am able to go to St. L for Christmas this year, so now I'm looking forward to that.  My girlfriend and I have a date next week where we're going to go to dinner and then go see Mike Birbiglia, and I'm looking forward to that.  Looking forward to buying and installing some fireplace doors and burning up all of the wood that's been sitting outside our house for the last 3 years.

We fed Sam some solid food for the first time yesterday.  Pureed apples.  So pretty much applesauce but without the extra sugar.  He didn't really seem to like it that much.  Made weird faces that I've never seen him make before, and at one point kinda looked like a cat trying to cough up a hairball.

Got some pictures from Katie the Traveler of the World over there in Kenya and they are pretty damned amazing.  Her first day there and she's out among the elephants and lions and all sorts of fauna.  How exciting!

Took a cute picture of the dude today, and since I'm trying to limit my facebook posting of cute pictures, I will now force you to look at it instead.

Thursday, October 04, 2012

In the Still of the Night

The Jeanners and Sambone are in Detroit until Sunday.  They left this afternoon.  What this means:

1.  I am going to SLEEP the fuck IN tomorrow.  I don't have to be at work until 5pm tomorrow and I am going to take full advantage of that fact. 

2.  The thought "I should buy a pack of cigarettes this weekend" was in my head for about 15 or 20 minutes yesterday and wouldn't really leave.  It's gone now, but for awhile there it was definitely a little devil voice blaring in both ears.  I will not be buying or smoking any cigarettes this weekend. 

3.  This afternoon before I left for work, late afternoon light was coming through our front window and spilling onto the floor where Sam's blanket was spread and a teddy bear and some toys were laying, and it looked like a shot from a movie about a dead baby. 

4.  This weekend is going to be a mixture of relaxation and housework.  Also Chinese food. 

On an unrelated note, Jeannie got a haircut and looks young and sexy.  Seriously.  Stay away from my wife. 

More later. 

Monday, October 01, 2012

Australian Nads

The title of this post comes from a night quite a few years ago when I was driving around St. Louis and I passed a Walgreen's that had one of those billboard things outside, and on the billboard it said, "Wallgreens has Australian Nads!"  I had no idea what that meant, but I always thought nads meant balls - the genital kind.  So I thought it was a weird thing to put on a billboard.  Maybe a prank?  But apparently it is also some sort of hair-removal wax-type product developed in, you guessed it, Australia.  Still, a weird thing to put on a billboard.

I had a darned good day today.  Had a meeting this morning at work, then came home, and when I got home my ladyfriend was taking our boy out for some shopping with a friend of ours and her son.  So I had the afternoon at home to myself, and I decided to spend the day working on putting up a door and frame for our linen closet, a project that has been on my to-do list for several months now.  It's amazing how much I can get done when there's no stinkin' baby here.  It's weird:  I really really liked him being gone today.  And it also crushes my heart a little bit whenever I'm not around him.  Like, at work tonight I just spend the night picturing his little smiling face and wishing I was at home playing with him.  It's kinda fun that the missing him and enjoying his absence can kind of occur at the same time.

The Schluetermetz' have arrived in Off-Broadway.  If anybody's in New York during the month of October, go see their play, North.  It's pretty good!  Plus, I once wrote some music for it.  Including a song in which I had to sing in French, a language that I do not know and do not like.  I was digging through a bunch of old computer files about a month ago and I came across some of the files of the different versions of the songs that I recorded for that show, and they are all uniformly terrible.  Especially the ones where I had to sing in French.  Embarrassing.  But, luckily the songs got cut and if you go see the play in New York you won't have to listen to them.  Break legs, weinerslaves!

Katie the North American Traveler will, as of tomorrow, become Katie the Traveler of the World.  She is heading off to Kenya to live in some sort of tent for a few months.  The woman is braver than I, and I hope she comes back with stories of wonderful yet safe adventures. 

Tomorrow we will be entrusting our boy to a day-care person (the husband of a co-worker of Jeannie's), something that we will need to do about 1 day a month because there's one Tuesday every month where both Jeannie and I need to be at work.  I'm not looking forward to it, but I'm thankful that we were able to find somebody who seems like he'll be good, and relatively convenient.  Anyway, I hope it all goes well. 

Friday, September 28, 2012

In September, When the Air Turns Crisp and My Yeast Begins to Thrive...

Sam just fell asleep for a nap, and it's not really time for him to fall asleep for a nap yet.  He should still be up for another hour, eat, and then fall asleep for a nap.  But I'm not complaining.  And the old adage about sleeping dogs applies to babies as well. 

Not too much going on here.  It's late September, and the weather here has just been gorgeous for quite awhile now.  Just cool enough for pants and a T-shirt.  Regular rain, but regular sunshine as well.  Beautiful. 

My sister and her husband were here for a visit over the weekend, and then stopped back in last night before heading to the airport this morning.  Had a good time catching up with them, and I think my sister got a little smitten with Sam. 

I finally learned how to play Ooh La La on guitar!  Fun one to sing along to. 

The A-Train came over on Wednesday night for dinner and a little baby-time, and it was good to catch up with her.  She will be in a (perhaps bad) production of Little Shop near our house, so I think we'll try and make our way over to see it at some point, cause I like that show and I think Aimee will make a good Audrey. 

Hmmm.  That's all I feel like writing right now. 

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Monday, September 17, 2012

The Kindness of Strangers

Well, at work tonight I was feeling proud as punch because I checked my e-mail (from my Razr phone!  Suck it, Steve Jobs!  Wait, I take that back.  I'm sorry you're dead.  And sorry for your friends and family.) and saw that a stranger had left a nice comment on my previous blog post (nice except for the part where he talks about coming upon me), and I also saw that what I thought was a stranger had "favorited" some of my songs on a music sharing website (although it turned out that that "stranger" is actually somebody that I knew from college, so now I don't know whether the "favoriting" was genuine or a courtesy favorite).  But anyway, it's nice to get compliments from people you've never met and who, most likely, you never will meet.

Yesterday me and the missus and our critter packed up and headed out to visit our friends Chris and Anna who live about an hour and a half to the West, and their young son Caleb, who is a mere 2 months older than our Sam.  And let me tell you, if you don't think that two sub-one-year-olds getting together and sniffing around each other and trying to eat each other is cute, then you are a soulless, sourpuss McGrumpy.  If you've ever wondered, "Am I dead inside?," watch this video and you will know:

I applaud Caleb's technique of attacking the eyes first.  I smell a future cage fighter.  Anyway, we had a very nice time meeting Caleb and catching up with Chris and Anna.  Also took a wonderful hike that made my ass hurt in a good way (but not that good), and finished it off with a tasty dinner.  Must make the effort to get out there more often.  P.S.  If you want to see a cute picture of me with two babies, check it out here at Anna's (and her sisters' [one of whom is Katie, the North American Traveller] ) blog.

Here's a funny story, and it's quick:  the other day I told a co-worker that adults shouldn't read comic books and watch superhero movies.  She told me adults shouldn't fart on other people.  Touche'. 

Thursday, September 13, 2012


There are several things I would like to do right now.  Sam has just gone to sleep for a lil' nap, and I need to:

1.  Eat breakfast.  Preferably eggs, bacon (aw, shizzle, I just remembered we're out of bacon), biscuits, juice. 

2.  Take a shower or bath.  Preferably a bath cause then I can reads while I gets clean.  I stink bad. 

3.  Brush teeths.

4.  Take a nap.  Rule #1 of baby raisin':  sleep when he/she sleeps.  

Really, I guess that's all I need to do right now.  Not as much as I thought.

I am watching the little bugger today while the J-Dog works, then I'll be going in to work tonight at 5.  I don't usually mind the 5 to Close shifts too much because I can often get away with not doing too much and reading a book or something.  I finished the David Foster Wallace biography last night and I've decided that I didn't really like it very much.  It did, however, make me go back and start re-reading Girl With Curious Hair, and then probably Brief Interviews... will be next, and then Oblivion.  And if I'm still in the mood for more DFW after all that, then I'll re-read Infinite Jest.  Still the best book out there, by the way. 

I got called for Jury Doodie the other day.  But it's been less than a year since I last served so I sent that summons right on back.  I think that I will be like my Dad, and enjoy getting called for Jury Doodie when I am retired, but whiles I gots billz to pay I can't be doing it more often than I need to. 

Well, blogg writing is not on my list of things I'd like to accomplish in the next 45-120 minutes, so I'd better get started on my cookin'.

(when I just wrote "cookin'", I first mis-typed it and wrote "xookin'," which I think looks like a pretty awesome word)

Saturday, September 08, 2012

Just Diarrhea

I think if I wrote a collection of short stories, it would be called Just Diarrhea.

Can you guess who my favorite song of the moment is by?  If you guessed Art Garfunkel, then you were right!  Seriously, though, it's on a new collection of his, and it's a pretty good song.  It's not like it's my favorite song of all time or anything, but I like it.  Plus, he says "fuck" in it.  You can listen to it here at NPR probably for a little while.  About halfway down the page.  It's called "Long Way Home."

I've been thinking lately about trying to do some recording.  I've got a few chord changes and melodies in my head that I'd like to try and flesh out to see if they could bcome something more or just die on the table.  I'm not sure, though, that setting up all the equipment and trying to carve out some time for recording is such a good idea, because it would be hard to record while Sam is awake, and hard to record while he is asleep, and it's not like the house is finished or anything.  So there's a lot going against it.  But who knows.  We'll see. 

The Jeanners and I got to see each other for longer than 15 minutes this morning, and it was pretty awesome.  Tomorrow we both have the day off together, which is even awesomer.

 (fart sound)

Today I took a nap in the back bedroom and it was fantastic.  If you're ever over at my house (and why wouldn't you be, really?), you should request to take a nap in the rear bedroom.  You'll probably have to remind me what you're talking about, cause I'll probably just assume you're talking about something dirty.

(fart sound)

I wonder if posts are funnier when, instead of just blank spaces in between paragraphs, there are fart sounds. Let's talk offline about it after the meeting.   

Wednesday, September 05, 2012

Rice O'Bill

My parents are here for a visit and dammit if it ain't going pretty well.  They have gotten quality time with the lil' Dude, the kind of QT they did not really get when we were in St. Louis in June.  So that's been nice.  They've also gotten to busy themselves with doing little projects around our house, which they have also enjoyed (although my dad has been chagrined that his chainsaw wouldn't start and thus he was not able to cut up the 4 branches in my yard that are too beefy for the loppers). 

The Jeanners has been real busy at work this week.  Getting home and eating dinner and spending a little time with the boy and then going to bed. 

Oh, and Sam made me so fucking crazy last night at 2am when he wouldn't go back to sleep that I wanted to throw him out the window.  Instead of throwing him out the window I instead went in and woke up my poor wife and asked for her help, and she was very nice and gracious to me and didn't get mad at me for waking her up despite the fact that she has been working very hard at work and doesn't get enough sleep.  A couple of redundancies in that last sentence.  Sorry. 

I am in the midst of reading the new DFW biography.  It's OK.  He has, up to the point where I am in the book (which is right around the time when he's starting IJ), come off as a bit of an asshole and a pretty complete fuck-up.  Somebody that just had no idea about how to create a balanced, happiness-conducive life.  I'm interested to see whether this changes as he gets older, as it seems like later in his life he might have been more able to get his shit together.  Anyway, reading the bio makes me want to go back and re-read everything, especially the Girl With Curious Hair stuff that I haven't read in awhile. 

That is all for now.  You may go back to your desk now. 

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Dumplings? Yes.

I think that Dumplings? Yes. would be a pretty good album title. 

Anyway, I'm about to eat a ginormous plate of leftover chickn' n' dumplins' sitting atop a fluffy bed o' mashers.  Probably about 1.5 pounds worth.  The C&D were made by Jeannie's Mom while she was staying here (she left this morning), the mashers were made by moi

So yes, the Jeanners' mother has been here for the last 12 days, and it's been great, as her visits usually are.  Great because for the last 12 days we haven't really had to worry about dishes or laundry or childcare, and great because some days we got to sleep in until 7 or 8, and also great because Jeannie's Mom is a really easy person to live with, and we're able to be comfortable and be ourselves and everybody I think enjoys it all very much.  As an example of the comfortable-ness:  yesterday I was outside working in the yeard, and Jeannie and her Mom were in the back bedroom with Sam, and I peeked in the window and Jeannie's Mom said, "Look, a burglar!" and then Jeannie said (to me):  "I'll burgle you right up your butt."  And then I had to assure Jeannie's Mom that Jeannie was only joking and that my butt had never actually been burgled.  Anyway, just the type of interaction that we're able to have that we wouldn't be able to have if, say, my parents were here. 

While J's Mom has been here, both Jerns and I have been working a lot.  The Jeanners will probably be pretty busy at work through the end of next week, and maybe a little longer -- it's her busy season.  I should be relatively un-busy at work for the next month or two, right until we start getting into the deep shit for Christmas. 

I wonder what we'll do for Turkeyday this year?  I wonder what we'll do for Christmas? 

Sam-o is sleeping. 

Thursday, August 23, 2012

3 AM Eternal

For some reason I thought that "3 A.M. Eternal" was a PM Dawn song (even though, now when I think about it, I remember the lyric "KLF is gonna rock you").  I'm glad I googled it before posting about it in this blog because if I hadn't I would've looked like a sucka. 

Well, it's a little after 3 in the morning and I'm sitting up on the couch eating a protein bar and it's not even baby-related, dammit.  (Meaning that the sitting up isn't baby related, not that the protein bar isn't baby related.  Although the protein bar isn't baby related, either, now that you mention it.  But the fact that I'm sitting up at 3 AM and it's not baby related is what's bothering me.)  Thinking about work.   Not really worrying, just replaying stuff in my head.  It's been a busy week, I've been working as an MOD by myself for the first times this week, and on my very first day as a solo MOD we had a 4 hour visit from a group of head honchos including the VP of loss prevention for the company.  I think I came off as a little bit harried at times but pretty well at other times.  Ugh.  It's sad to care about a job that you don't care about. 

Jeannie's Mom is visiting right now, and it's a great time for her to be here because work has been so busy this week.  Then my folks are coming for a visit in early September. 

MOD, in the context I used earlier, stands for Manager On Duty.  After googling it, I see it can also stand for Minister Of Defense.  Just wanted to add some clarification. 

I should go back to bed.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Tharty Fahve!

Today's my 35th birthday.  I passed the day thusly:  going to work in the morning, coming back home at around 9:00am, opening cards and presents from Jeanners and Sam, farting around on the computer, napping, going back to work at around 5pm, coming home, talking with the Jeanners, feeding Sam, trying to get him to go to sleep, getting him to fall asleep on the living room couch, getting a fucking cricket out from under the radiator in our rear bedroom because it (the cricket) was driving me fucking crazy, putting the cricket outside, carrying Sam into his room, settling down to record all of this wonderfulness for posterity. 

Sam got me $50 for my birthday, to put towards my purchase of an Onkyo TX-8050 stereo receiver.  What a guy. 

The other night (last Sunday night), when I went out with my co-workers for drinks after work, I had 3 beers at the bar and 1 beer at home, for a total of 4 beers.  Spread out over about 3.5 hours.  And I woke up on Monday with a pretty substantial hangover, and the hangover was mostly gone by the end of the day on Monday, but a piece of it still lingered for the rest of the damned week.  What gives??? I can only surmise that someone must have slipped me some sort of drug, probably because they wanted to have their sordid little way with me.  I've narrowed it down to Jeannie or Brian G. 

The Jeanners got me The Koran for my birthday.  I'm spelling it the way it's spelled on the book, so if you don't like it direct your complaints to the book, please. 

Jeannie's mom is going to be coming out this weekend and staying for about a week and a half.  I'm looking forward to it.  It means that the Jeanners and I will get to go on some dates, and also I might be able to get some stuff done around the house. 

It's been a good year.  Weird to think that right around this time last year we were starting to figure out that the J-Dog was preggers. 

Ok, I'm gonna go now. 

Thursday, August 09, 2012


Just got in from Atlanta this evening, where we spent the last 3 days.  The Jeanners had to go to a bit of a conference for the Habitat, and I was able to take the days off so I tagged along. 

Stayed in a very nice, very tall hotel.  We were on the 43rd floor of like 75 floors.   The view from our room looked like this:

I liked it.  Made me feel like Scarlet Johansson in Lost in Translation.  Especially when Bill Murray kissed me. 

Yesterday I spent the day with my Aunt and Uncle, which was fun but much too long of a day. Today I hung out around the hotel and drank a chai latte that made me a happy boy. 

Other things that happened:

I said these things to either my son or my wife.  You make the call:  "Are you choking on that?"  and  "Let's stick that in your mouth rather than your eye." 

I watched an adult male on the plane home tonight work his way through a book of word searches.  Seriously?  Are word searches for adults?  Are there other adults out there that work on word searches?   Also, he was using a highlighter to do the word searches.  Strike two. 

Our plane was a bit delayed and we sat on the runway for 2 hours.  Not a fun thing to do with a baby.  He used up all of his nap on runway sitting.  Luckily we were sitting next to a very chatty, nice, baby-lover.  

The cool kids trash the hotel:

Bedtime for Bonzo!

Sunday, August 05, 2012

Go the _____ to Sleep.

Hmmm.  Sam's schedule seems all messed up the last day or so.  Not eating real well, not sleeping real well.  Which makes him get hungry like every hour, and then fall asleep as soon as he starts eating.  Ugh.  Tough on the Jeanners.  She's trying to catch a few more ZZZ's before she gets up to head off to yoga class at 10:45 this morning.  Will she go?  I think she probably will.

I'll be heading into work this afternoon, maybe going out for a drink afterwards.  Haven't had drinks with any work folks in quite awhile (since January), mostly because there are a lot of lames working at the Nobes these days. 

The Jeanners and I will be heading to Atlanta in a coupla days.  She has to go for work, and I am travelling as child care.  We will only be there from Tuesday to Thursday, but it will be nice to get away for a little while.  I've got an aunt and uncle living there that we'll be meeting up with.  I am now going to google the hotel and check out the amenities.  Hoping for sauna or steam room.


I get the impression no sauna or steam room.  But that's OK.  It looks like a snazzy hotel.  I can (sniff) make do without a sauna or steam room.

I cut the grass the other day and did one hell of a trimming job.  I feel much better about myself.

Reading the Carolyn Cassady book is making me feel like I'm going to go on a Kerouac binge next.  But I'm also jonesin' for a re-read of Infinite Jest.  What to do?

I've been enjoying the new Bobby Womack album, even though it's pretty weird.  90's beats, a kinda nasal old-ish black man singing, and sparse piano.  But it all adds up.

Wednesday, August 01, 2012

This page has been redesigned to better meet your banking needs

That's what was at the top of my online banking page today.  And in my head I said to it, "Fuck you, you don't even know me." 

Today I stayed home with the boy and then went into work this evening, came home and had a few minutes chatting about the day with the J-Dog on the bed, and now she is asleep and I am in the living room checking my shit and drinking a G&T and eating crackers.  It was a good day.

Tomorrow:  meeting about theatre-building stuff, hopefully cutting the grass.  Our yard has gotten to be a bit disgraceful this summer:  garden is a complete overgrown mess, grass has gone unmowed for too long several times, and weeds are running rampant in all of the planting beds. 

Watched a funny episode of CHEERS yesterday.  It was the "Woody, I'm going to steal your girlfriend," one. 

Jeannie and I are going to Atlanta next week.  Oh, and we're bringing the baby with us.  It is weird now that I cannot properly describe our plans by saying, "Jeannie and I are going to __________."  That I now have to include a third person in that sentence.  Not sure I like it yet.  I like having a baby, though.  He makes me very happy. 

I'm reading a book right now that I really like a lot:  Off the Road, by Carolyn Cassady.  She was Neal Cassady's wife, and the book is basically an autobiography of her time with Casssady, Kerouac, and Ginsberg, and it's really interesting to hear the stories of these adventurous men from the perspective of the wife who continuously got left behind with the kids.  And yet who was also a definite part of the group, and a part of the writing and the letters and the scene that kept the whole thing going.  If you're a Kerouac fan and have gone through all of his stuff, it's definitely worth a read. 

I should go to bed.  If this meeting tomorrow is anything like the last one, I'm gonna have to get up early just to try on all my different outfits before I find one I like. 

Does anybody actually read this thing anymore? 

Friday, July 27, 2012

Our Flow is Always in Escrow

For the last few months, I have been going folder by folder and removing files from a damaged 500GB external hard drive.  The hard drive is what we used to back up all of our stuff - pictures, music, all the tracks from songs I'd recorded for myself and others, etc.  So the hard drive is broken but I found a trick on the internet where you put your drive in the freezer, and then take it out and try to get the files off of it.  It will work until the drive heats up too much and stops working again.  Then you put it back in the freezer and repeat the process.  It's all very fascinating, but it only lets you dump a couple of GB at a time, which is why this process has taken a long time.


Yesterday I was finishing up getting the files off of the hardrive, and in the process of putting it all on fresh drives I was organizing it and looking through old pictures and songs and stuff.  What fun!  The highlight of the day, I think was digging out the Steinmetz Family Rhymin' and giving it a couple of spins.  It has stood the test of time.  Lyrics?  Tight.  Flow?  Never defaults.  Production?  Kickin'.   I still give it an A+.  Just in case it's been awhile for you, here it is:

(p.s.  If any participants in the SFR wish me to take it down, just let me know and I will)

Also great to look through old pictures.

Sam's 3 month birthday was yesterday.  He spent it eating, pooping, sleeping, and attempting to stand up.  He recently decided he doesn't really like laying down anymore, but what he REALLY likes to do is stand up with somebody holding him under his pits.  Anyway, here's what he's looking like:

Sunday, July 22, 2012


What the hell's going on?  Not much.  I got home from work tonight (work which was very boring, and stupid, and pointless) and watched a couple of FRIENDS episodes with my ladyfriend, while our offspring slept and dreamt, and we ate chips and salsa.  And my ladyfriend added cheese to the salsa, which was the best idea that anybody had all day. 

All of the vowels on this keyboard are having problems.  Well, at least E and O.  I've had to go back and re-type like 50% of them in. 

Also, gin and tonic from a jar. 

I think Sam is getting to the point where he's so cute that it's becoming problematic for Jeannie and I.  Or maybe we're getting to the point where we think he's so cute that we start becoming big pains in the ass. 

Are you having problems figuring out what to get me for my birthday?  Easy.  Get me an Onkyo TX-8050.  You're welcome. 

I should really go to bed. 

Sunday, July 15, 2012

They're gonna have to dust your chin for groin prints.

Tonight was boring as hell at work, so I read a little bit from a lesser-known Kerouac book and thought about travelling.  I thought about one day in the future, maybe when Sam is 6 or 7, taking a trip up to Alaska and seeing Spifferoo and recording some songs.  I thought about taking another bus ride up to New York to see the Schluetermetz' show this fall (maybe a coupla times).  And I thought about a time on Spring Break during my senior year of college, when Sean and Misty and I were on some very windy, mountainous road in the Blue Ridge Mountains that had a posted sign that said 'avoid this road in icy weather' (or something to that effect), and we were driving around in ice and snow and fog in my little 4-cylinder Dodge Spirit.  I miss that car.  Gordon.  El Gordo.  And we thought we were going to die on that road.  And then eventually we got to this little town at the bottom of the mountain that was pretty and snowy.  And I still have a picture of that town in my head and I have no idea if it's a real picture or just a made-up memory. 

Tonightat work I decided that I was going to have a G&T in a ball jar when I got home.  I have a G&T out of a glass when I just want to unwind, out of a ball jar when I want to get silly. 

Anyway, I look forward to travelling with Sam.  Of course I'd eventually like to get to Europe, and part of me is glad that Jeannie and I haven't been yet, and now when we go we can take the boy with us. 

What's been going on?  What do I want to remember? 

Jeannie and I headed over to PFI last night to see Pride and Prejudice.  Took Sam with us.  It was a little tricky, because we had hoped to have him fed and asleep by the time the show started, but he was just finishing eating when the show started and it took most of the first act to get him to go to sleep.  So it wasn't as stressless and relaxing as we hoped the evening would be, but at least he wasn't making a lot of noise or fussing or anything. 

The recent house projects have involved putting up doors and door jambs.  We have to put up a door and jamb on the linen closet, and then all the doors will be up except for bedroom closets, which is pretty exciting.  And then once the doors are all up, we can start putting up trim and the house will start to look pretty again. 

Life is good.  That's all for now. 

Thursday, July 05, 2012

Running Mix

So now this is what runs through my head while I'm at work.  (Sigh).  It always makes me tear up a little bit when I watch it.  I am becoming a sentimental sap (I guess I've always been a sentimental sap [it's why I like the sad, slow Tom Waits songs better than the loud brawlers], but I am now less able to hide it.  Or less interested in hiding it.), but I don't mind too much.  I really love the dude, and I really love Jeannie, and I really love this time of us all being together and happy.  And, weirdly enough, having a kid has made me feel younger rather than older.  I really thought it would make me feel older.  But things seem fresh and new in a way that they haven't for quite awhile. 

Anyway, this is the video I will watch when he gets older and he stops listening to anything I say. 

Jeannie's heading to work today for the first real time. 

I am crafting the perfect running mix.  It's not quite right yet, but all it needs is a few tweaks. 

Sunday, July 01, 2012

We're having a heatwave, a tropical heatwave.

So we had a big storm on Friday night and luckily, did not lose power.  Unfortunately, we lost power at 4pm on Saturday, about 14 hours after the storm had passed.  Ugh.  I probably shouldn't have gloated about my A/C to all of those homeless people I passed by yesterday.  Stupid karma.  Anyway, power came on in the middle of last night after some very hot laying in bed.  And not the good kind.

I think my son is trying to take a shit right here next to me on the couch.  Rude little bastard, isn't he?  One day when he's older and can appreciate it I'll pay him back by taking a shit right next to him on the couch and see how he likes it.  0i-o-i-o-0iikppokpkjjjjjjjjjomp=[-----------------------------------------------------------kljiuikm

I just went to heat up a bottle, and when I came back, something (or someone?) had typed all of those weird letters and symbols.  Hmmm.  Sam's first blog post?  Poltergeist? 

I went for a run this morning, as I have found that running seems to help the lung condition that I was experiencing (the one where my lungs don't seem to actually move air), and I haven't had to use my inhaler since I started running regularly again.  Hopefully that will keep me running regularly and help get rid of my belly, which is comprised mostly of turkey sandwiches cooked in butter, IBC Cream Soda, and chocolate chunk cookies.  Anyway, since I got back from my run, I have been sitting on the couch and now the couch is sweaty.  Don't worry, we've been planning on laundering the couch cover anyway.

Jeannie and I like being parents so far.

Today, we actually have a house project!  We're going to try and put up a door and jamb on our rear (guest) bedroom.  So the next time you and your significant other come to visit, you can have sex!  Unless you're not married, in which case your romantic activity will be limited to heavy petting.  Either way, it'll be nice to have a door. 

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Trying to Find Those Stupid Nipples

We are back from a week in St. Louis.  All in all a good week, although I would've liked to have seen Rico Rico and I also would have liked to have seen Wes Anderson's newest movie with Ricky Elz, with whom I have had the pleasure of seeing several Wes Anderson movies.  Oh well.  I guess we don't always get what we want. 

It was good to take Sam around and introduce him to family and friends, and it made leaving especially hard, cause who knows who will still be around the next time we make it home and who won't.  Ugh.  Don't even like thinking about that stuff, but there it is. 

It has been very hot, both here and in St. Louis, but our house has stayed remarkably pleasant.  God bless insulation and ceiling fans. 

Apparently, all ears of corn have 18 rows of kernels. 

Wait, I just looked it up and that's not true. 

I think this might be my favorite music video of all time:

How can anyone not like Lionel Richie? 

Saturday, June 16, 2012

America's Dumbest and Deadest

Took the Gasman on his first roadtrip today.  It was a small one, to see how he did.  About 3 hrs away, although with him it took about 3 and a half.  Had a wedding to go to up in State College, Pennsylvania.  Home of Penn State.  When I was a kid I decided, for no apparent reason, that I wanted to go to Penn State.  Well now I finally have. 

'America's Dumbest and Deadest People' is the name of a television show that the Jeanners came up with today.  Sort of a companion show to AFV.  AFV stands for America's Funniest Videos. 

One time when I was a freshman in high school, I called the first girl I ever kissed on the telephone, and she said, "Can I call you back, I'm watching America's Funniest People."  I knew instantly that she did not like me.  I don't remember if I ever spoke to her again.  The kiss was not very good.  It was my second kiss that I really remember as being indicative of what a kiss should really be like.  That kiss happened at a mixer (also my freshman year) during the song 'Brown Eyed Girl.' 

Sam did fine on his roadtrip, by the way. 

Off to bed. 

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Morning Constitutional

Sam's morning routine seems to have settled into this:  from about 4:30 until 7am he rolls around, half asleep, grunting and huffing, and then takes 3 shits spaced out about 15 minutes from each other.  DO NOT change his diaper after the first shit; you will regret it.  Anyway, on mornings where I am off work, I usually bring him into the living room in his little rolly bassinett so's the Jeanners can get a few hours of uninterrupted snoozles.

Not much to write about today.  I'm off work and I have a list of things to do - little things, mostly, because the Jeanners will be gone most of the day and I'm gonna be watching the Gasman.  Oh, I'm trying out Gasman as my nickname for Samuel.  I haven't really liked any of the nicknames that start with S, but I do like the way Gasman sounds. 

Had a dream the other night that Widitz had died and nobody had told me about it.

Had a dream last night that I'm not sure what the overall plot was about, but one scene involved sitting in a college lecture hall listening to some sort of wizard-type dude sing a song.  While some other dude was trying to get us or prevent us from hearing the song or something.  Oh, and I have no idea who the "us" was, I just know there was an "us."

Dreams are crazy.  The other night after I got home from work I wasn't ready to go to bed yet, and I exhausted all of my usual Internet reading options, so I came here to the blog, did a search for the word DREAM, and read all of my posts over the years where I describe some of my whack dreams.  It was pretty fun.  I think my favorites were this one, where Pat gets beheaded onstage, this one, with Ava Gabor's bush, and this one, where nobody likes Schlueter.  Although I think the best one for general wackiness is this one.

Work has been giving me little headaches lately.  Nothing major, but just enough to be annoying.

Saturday, June 09, 2012


Tonight at work I was going up an escalator and I had the sensation that my fly was down and that my dongbone was poking out of my pants.  It wasn't. 

Just got home from work, and I'm kickin' back with a G&T.  The Jeanners and the Sam must be asleep, or else they have gone out to some super-awesome underground Mother/Son club. 

The house is quiet.

Two things that I have appreciated greatly over the past few weeks:

1.  The work of Dr. Harvey Karp.  I hope that wherever that man is, he is sitting back with a fruity drink while scantily clad men and women fan him with enormous tropical leaves.  I would be totally willing to pay him $30 a month for the rest of my life. 

2.  All the damned ceiling fans that we have put in this place.  I can't tell if I don't mind the way they look or if I hate the way they look, but Jeez-o I love having constantly moving air. 

I'm gonna try not to eat a huge breakfast tomorrow, but I bet I end up eating a huge breakfast tomorrow.  

Tuesday, June 05, 2012

Ianic Pentameter

I had a dream last night that my friend Ian (who pronounces his name EYE-uhn, by the way) invented his own verse meter, and he called it Ianic Pentameter.  Normal Iambic Pentameter goes like this:  da-DUM, da-DUM, da-DUM, da-DUM, da-DUM.  But in my dream, Ianic Pentameter went like this:  da-DUM, da-DUM, da-DUM, da-DUM....(pause)....ta da!

For real.  That's what my dream was about last night.  Does anybody else out there dream about verse? 

Today I realized that I would totally watch a TV show that starred Scott Bakula and Richard Dean Anderson as cowboys.  If only such a show existed.

Little dude's doing fine.

We've made plans to come to St. Louis for a week starting June 20th.  Lookout, St. Louis, yer about to get shat on by my boy!

Been listening to a lot of Lionel Richie lately.  Can you believe he's 62?  Doesn't look a day over 50.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012


Jeannie took this picture the other day, and yesterday at work I was just thinking about it all day and couldn't wait to get home and hang out with the lil' dude.  And the Jeanners, of course.  Partly because I like both of them and partly because work was pretty boring and my feet were hurting.

Right now it's six-thirty in the morning, and I'm sitting up with Sam and the Jeanners is catching a little bit of sleep until he gets hungry again, and he's over in his bassinet, breathing heavily and farting.  Come to think of it, that's what I'm doing, too.

I'm realizing that I've become one of those people who does nothing on Facebook except post pictures of their stupid kid, but really, I can't help myself.  And I can justify it by saying that it's for out-of-town relatives and stuff, but really it's just because I want people to think that my kid is cute.

Last night I ate 2 hotdogs before bed and it was a bad idea.

Been starting to run a little bit again.  I'm only up to about a mile during each run, but I figured a little bit of exercise might help give me a little more energy during this time of less-than-usual sleeping.  So far it's been good, except that I feel like I weigh about 1000 lbs, 900 of which are in my legs.

We are making some plans for a St. Louis trip sometime in June.  Haven't bought the tickets yet, but we're close.

What else?

We went to a fun party on Saturday with ChesShakesCo folks, thanking Scott and Lesley for their part in acquiring the building.  Took Sam along and he got to meet a bunch of different folks.  He did pretty darn well and was pretty chill the whole time.

Then yesterday Roger and Sammy and Nyoka came over and hung out with Jeannie a bit, and then I came home from work and we played a fun board game called 'Ticket to Ride.'


Wednesday, May 23, 2012


Hey, this is my 800th blog post.  And I started back on May 10, 2005.  So 800 posts in a little over 7 years isn't too bad - approx. 114 posts per year, so roughly one every 3.2 days.  I think I've kept you all very well informed as to the state of my lower GI.  Actually, I started writing the blog for two reasons:  1)  because I have always had a bad memory for life events, and I could feel it getting worse.  And 2)  because I found myself writing the same e-mail to multiple people, filling them in on the things that were going on.  And so I started writing the blog so I wouldn't have to write the same e-mail 5 times.  And the blog has been successful on both fronts - whenever i have trouble remembering something I can usually go back and check what I wrote about it on the blog, and I definitely send fewer e-mails to people, for better or worse.   The problem with a blog is that it's usually a one-way conversation, so I generally feel more out of touch with people than I did before I started this.  Oh well. 

Jeannie's Mom had been here since May 10 (the anniversary of the birth of the blog, by the way, which you'd know if you've been paying close attention), but left last night to head back to St. Louis.  It was a really great trip and I think everybody enjoyed it and was a little sad that she was leaving.  I truly lucked out in the Mother-in-Law department (and she doesn't read this so I'm not just saying that to suck up).  She's always been very cool to me, and for the last week and a half she's been a really great housemate.  So hopefully it's something she can do again in the future, because it was super-helpful for us, and I think she really enjoyed getting to spend time with Sam, and I know that as Sam gets older he'll benefit from time spent with his Grandma. 

Yesterday the insurance company paid us the 700+ dollars that they owed us that I've been hounding them abour for the last 4 months or so.  The sweet taste of victory.  Just in time for us to start fighting with them about the hospital bills for Sam's birth.  Ugh. 

I'm officially back into the grind at work and it is both more painful and less painful than it was before I left.  More painful because I care even less about being there, and less painful because I care even less about being there. 

Hmmm.  What else?  Jeannie's going to physical therapy today because her shoulder has been bothering her from feeding a burping Sam, and she's had shoulder issues in the past that PT has helped.  So her Mom and I took over as much of the burping duties as we could.

I think that's it. 

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Shoots Poop

Well, I just gave Sam his Native Aerican-style name, and it is Shoots Poop.  My guess is that that's a fairly common Native American baby name, kinda like John or James or Mary or something.  The dude's new favorite activity seems to be to wait until we are changing his diaper and then shooting his poop either on the changer, he new diaper, or the wall.  Oh well.  There's something very bond-forming about seeing the poop shoot out of someone's butt. 

Happy 1st Mother's Day to the J-Dog!  She's a great Mom (so far), everybody would be proud if they could see her. 

Today we Skype'd with my parents for the first time.  It was fine and relatively uneventful.  Thanks to my nephew for walking my Mom through setting up a Skype account. 

I went back to work yesterday, which was painful at first but then not too bad.  It seems like right after I got back, the first thing that happened was that everybody told me all the stuff that went wrong while I was gone, so I spent the first few hours dealing with all of that stuff, and then after awhile I was able to settle back into a more normal work day. 

Off to the grocery store!

Wednesday, May 09, 2012

KKK Duck

Hey folks.  Just sitting here hanging with Sam, who is sitting on the couch next to me, loading his britches repeatedly.  This kid has some supremely loud farts and poops, like hear-them-from-the-other-room loud.  I doubt that this factoid surprises anyone. 

Tomorrow we will be picking up Jeannie's Mom from the airport.  She'll be staying wth us for about a week and a half, which is pretty awesome because I will be heading back to work on Saturday, and it will be nice to have an extra pair of hands around to help with stuff, and nice for Jeannie to have some adult company at home while I am at work.

Right now there's a song out that I am enjoying:

I heard them yesterday on the 'World Cafe.'

Tonight we gave sam a bath, and he has this little hooded towel, and Jeannie said he looked like a 'KKK Duck.'

That's all I got for now.

Monday, May 07, 2012

Big News

The Chesapeake Shakespeare Company closed on this building today:

Pretty darned exciting.  Congrats to all involved.

Sunday, May 06, 2012

Morning-time (or, I Love This Jong)

It feels earlier than it is.  Which is 8:30.  Feels earlier.

Sitting on the couch, Sam is sleeping/gurgling/chugging/sighing over in his little rolly bassinet, The Jeanners is sleeping in the bedroom, the birds outside are singing and the world seems to be waking up, although the traffic out on Walther isn't very loud yet.

Yesterday we had a really nice visit from Aimeeudio, The Beej, and Abby.  They came over to meet the lil' guy and hang out and then went and picked up some Chipotle for lunch.   Very nice to chat and see the Beej and get to know Abby a little more.   And, of course, it's always good to see the A-Train.  This is my hope for her:  that she finds another job but does not decide to move.  Note - the last part of that hope is purely selfish. 

My stomach just growled and it made me remember that we're out of bacon.  And biscuits.  Ugh.  And the morning takes a sinister turn.  Then for breakfast it shall be:  eggs, fauxsage, potatoes, cheese.  Cooked in a scramble.  Perhaps pancakes. 

Had a dream last night that I moved to Chicago.  Also had a dream that I was at a park with BJ, Pat, Ian, and Lesley and that I was playing basketball with a 7-foot-tall basket.  Awesome dunks. 

Ugh.  Tummy growls have become intolerable.  Sam sounds asleep.  Time to start on b-fast.

Friday, May 04, 2012


J-Dog and I just got done watching the movie Milk with little Samuel sandwiched between us on the bed, so I guess you could say it was his first movie, although he slept through most of it.  Already taking after his mother's glorious propensity for falling asleep during movies, plays, etc.

It seems this week has been all about milk, really.  Our schedule has revolved around it and not much else.  Which has been kinda nice.  I don't know when the next time that Jeannie and I both have 3 weeks off work with not much to do will happen, so we've just been trying to enjoy each other's company, and enjoy getting to know the little guy, and enjoy taking care of each other.

What else?

Been transferring files off of a faulty external drive, been wrangling with my insurance company over an old bill for which they owe us $700 (and actually wrote a complaint to the Office of the State Attorney General!), mowed the lawn, did a little minor plumbing repair.

Hmmmm.  That's about it, really.  Life feels really good.  Why do we have to have stupid jobs?

Monday, April 30, 2012

All Apologies

I'm going to apologize right now if every post for the next long while has something to do with Sam.  But he happens to be what is going on right now, so I'm gonna write about him, dammit.  At least you won't have to hear any more about what's going on with the house.

I played him his first piece of recorded music today:

He was fussy, then when the music started he started smiling and paying attention.  He really seemed to enjoy it.

Also, a few minutes ago we were sitting on the couch together (OK, he was sleeping), and The Verve's 'On Your Own' came on, which is a great fucking song, and I love it.  And I've always loved the whole idea of the song, 'you come in on your own and you leave on your own...etc.'  But as I listened this time I realized that it's kind of flawed.  You really don't come in on your own.  Or at least you might not.  You might come in with a whole team of people waiting for you and shouting for you and pushing you and welcoming you and trying to make sure that you come in as easily and pleasantly as possible.

So maybe you don't have to leave on your own, either.

I have to say, this whole experience has totally messed up my emotions.  Blaaagh.

I'm going to go into work tomorrow for a few hours in the morning.  We'll see how that goes. 

Right now Jeannie is making a cardboard mustache to put on Sam.  No lie.

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Samuel's Origin Story

So, our son Samuel was born on Thursday, April 26th, at 11:07AM.

The info:

First name:  Samuel (or Sam, or Sammy, or Samsonite, or Samosa, whatever.)
Middle name:  Anderson
Last name:  O'Brien
Weight @ birth:  7lbs, 15.6 oz.
Length @ birth: 20.5 inches

The story (from my POV):

So on Tuesday night at around 11pm, Jeannie and I were just getting into bed after a day of not doing much:  she had a midwife appointment, we ran some errands, we sat around.  So around 11 she starts having contractions, and with each contraction she starts having diarrhea.  And the contractions are about 15 minutes apart.  So every 15 minutes she's getting up to be in pain and poop.  Until sometime in the middle of the night when she starts throwing up with every contraction, too.  So she's starting things off not in a good way, because normally early in labor you should be resting as much as possible, drinking a lot of water, and eating some so you've got energy for the rest of the whole thing.  So she's able to do none of that.  And she's gotten no sleep because everything started happening right at bedtime. 

So Wednesday morning, after a night of getting sleep in 5 minute doses, I call the midwife to check in and tell her what's going on.  She tells me to try and get Jeannie to drink some Gatorade or Pedialyte and call her back when the contractions are about 5 minutes apart.  So we spend most of Wednesday with Jeannie either in bed, in the bathroom, or slowly walking around the house with pots and pans in every room in case she needs to throw up.  Until around 4pm, when the contractions were finally starting to speed up, and were about 6-8 minutes apart.  So I called the midwife again, and said look, she hasn't been able to keep any fluids down, and the contractions are about 6 minutes apart, and can you please just take a look at her.  So the midwife tells me to bring Jeannie to the hospital so she (the midwife) can check her (the Jeanners) out.  So we throw our hospital bag in the car and very slowly walk out to the car, and then very cautiously yet deliberately drive downtown to Mercy hospital. 

We get to the hospital around 5pm, and go up to the delivery floor where they take her into a triage room and run all the normal tests on her, and discover that she has extremely high blood pressure and also is not dialated very much (3-4 cm.  She needs to be dialated 9-10 cm to deliver.)  But, because of her alarmingly high blood pressure (something like 180-something over 120-something), and the fact that her contractions were strong and regular, they admitted her into the hospital.  They told her that because of the high blood pressure, they would need to put her on magnesium to help prevent her from seizing (!!), and also that being on magnesium would make the whole process suck.

So we get admitted to our delivery room, and this is where the whole process got really weird and terrible (for me), and time stopped having any sort of meaning and everything.  So we get admitted to our room at probably around 6pm or so, and because Jeanners has been laboring for 19 hours at this point, and is still only 4-5 cm dialated and has a long way to go, she opts for the epidural to try and get some rest (epidurals basically numb you from the belly down so you don't feel the contactions as much).  So she got an epidural and was able to get a few hours of sleep (again, by this point time had stopped meaning anything, so I have no idea how long she slept or what time it was when we woke up) and rest, which was wonderful, and she woke up later and we talked a little bit about how wonderful the epidural was and how nice it was to be able to get some rest.  Oh, also the epidural helped her to stop throwing up, which was a good thing.  So anyway, after some time, that epidural wore off, and she was still only about 6 cm dialated, and the pain of the contractions was coming through again, but she still had a long way to go.  So they gave her another epidural, and she was able to rest for a little while, and then that one wore off.  And she was still only 6 cm dialated.

So I think at this point it's sometime in the middle of the night on Thursday morning, probably around 3 or 4am.  And the anesthesiologist (Dr. Wu) comes back in and says that she can't get any more epidurals, and he was a bit stymied about why they weren't really lasting very long and said that there was one more thing they could try but that it was something that they rarely ever used for vaginal deliveries, and it was called a spinal catheter.  He said that it was the same type of anesthesia that they used for a caesarean and that it is pretty much going to be 100% effective at stopping any pain.  So the Jeanners gives him a weak thumbs up and he comes back in a little while later and gives her the spinal catheter.  She's then able to sleep for a couple of hours.  I really have no idea how long.

So then at 7am on Thursday morning, a new midwife comes on.  Her name is Kate and she's probably late-20's or early 30's, maybe.  I feel very hungover because I haven't really eaten or drunk much and haven't slept much.  The Jeanners is awake, and the spinal catheter is wearing off, and she's about 8 cm dialated.  The baby has dropped really low (I should add here that the baby has been very low for a long time by this point, and that's part of the reason why there was a lot of pain.  Low baby + not enough dialation = pain.), and Kate decides to try and work some manipulation magic and try and get Jeannie to 10cm so she can start pushing.  I have no idea what Kate did, but she was able to move things around and somehow get Jeannie ready for pushing.  Jeannie, at this point, after 2 epidurals, the spinal catheter, the continuous magnesium drip, and maybe 4 hours of sleep in the last 32 hours, is pretty much just the shell of a person.  She's laying there, and she's getting maybe a minute of rest in between contractions, and they're hurting BAD, and she's is just 100% exhausted.  Nothing left. 

And then it's time for her to push.  And Kate is there at Jeannie's feet, and there's a nurse named Tiffany that's holding her left leg, and I'm holding her right leg, and every time there's a contraction, she pushes about 3 or 4 times for ten seconds.  And I have no idea how she did it, because she seriously had NOTHING LEFT, but for about 3 hours she pushed and pushed and pushed and pushed and pushed and pushed and pushed.  And then Samuel was born.

So that's how he got here.