I, Clavdivs

Really having trouble focusing on writing lately. I guess this is one of those times where having a blog isn't very fun or interesting, and you gots to just keep on keepin' on. I suppose that I just got out of the groove, and must go through the motions until the groove returns.

Quite a few interesting things have happened over the last week or so, so let's see what we can remember:

1. The J-Dog had her birthday last Thursday. We both had the day off work, and it was a lovely day, weather-wise, so after going to HCCA to re-mount the set for The Country Wife, The Jeanners and I had a tasty Qdoba (is that how it's spelled? Why don't I know how that's spelled?) lunch and headed down to DC to see some museums and frolic about the town. The National Gallery of Art (and Farts) had an exhibit of a photographer that I've been a fan of for awhile, Robert Frank, and we got to see that, which was nice. We also went to the Hirschorn Museum and saw some Modern Farts and Sculpture, which was less interesting but we had fun frolicking. Then we drove home and went to dinner with Katie (who has once again left town to go work on her farm in Massachusetts) at an Ethiopian Restaurant of Jeannie's choice called the Dukem Restaurant (or something like that). I was not really a fan of the Ethiopian food, because the bread stuff was kinda like a cross between pancakes and human skin. I am not a fan of eating either. The Ethiopian beer was OK, though.

2. Nice customer, Mr. Kim, gave me a bottle of very nice cognac. I'm not sure how to drink it, not sure if I'll like it, and a little intimidated by it. But, like Miss Scarlet in the movie Clue, I enjoy getting presents from strange men.

3. The Jeanners and I went to dinner and to see The Country Wife with PKP on opening night, and then we all went to the opening night party afterward. The show was better than expected (and got a good review in the Baltimore Sun!) and it sure was good hanging with the PKP, although he did cut stinky fahts during the show, and his hair is long like a girl's. And he's gonna be a daddy in like, jeez, any day now. So that's pretty exciting stuff.

4. I spent a good portion of my most recent day off playing Civilization III. It was pretty great.

5. Everything I'm reading about the upcoming U2 album is very exciting. Everything I've heard from it is not. Although I think the mark of a great album is that it's better than the sum of its parts. Perhaps this album will be like that.

6. As the Facebookers already know, I sent a letter to Willie Nelson's manager, because I've always heard Willie Nelson's voice singing some songs that I wrote quite a few years ago. The truth is that I actually heard Johnny Cash singing one of them and Willie singing the other one, and then Johnny Cash died. So now I'll never hear Johnny Cash sing that one. But I figured I could actually do something about the other one, so I figured I would write to Willie Nelson someday. Well, for some reason, it kept me awake the other night thinking about it, so I got off my ass and wrote a quick, awkward letter that included links to the songs and put it in the mail to his manager's address, which I found on Le Interwebbe. Not expecting anything to come of it, but it felt good to do.

7. Jeannie and I started watching I, Claudius (or as we like to call it, I Clavdivs). She fell asleep. I thought it was a little bit corny, and, well, I think I've become spoiled by the lavish production values of shows like Rome and Deadwood. And I Clavdivs doesn't really stack up. Plus, Brian Blessed looks like Richard Kind.

The Jeanners' Special Day

The Answers

Since I have not been writing much for awhile, I'm feeling rusty. Therefore, I will use this opportunity to post the answers to the quiz from a few weeks back, as a warm -up for future posting.


1. What is my all-time favorite breakfast?
a) 2 bowls of Lucky Charms with milk, 1 banana.
b) 2 eggs over easy, 3 pieces of bacon or sausage patties, toast, juice.
c) 3 fried eggs, 1 can of black beans, 3 TBSP salsa, 1 TBSP lowfat greek-style
yogurt. Mash it all together.

ANSWER: B. THIS WAS A TRICK QUESTION, AS I'VE BEEN EATING A LOT OF "C" LATELY, AND I USED TO LOVE ME SOME "A". BUT IF WE'RE TALKING ABOUT ALL-TIME FAVORITE, IT'S GOTTA BE "B".

2. How many siblings do I have?
a) 0
b) 1
c) 2
d) 3
e) 4

ANSWER: D. TWO OLDER SISTERS AND AN OLDER BROTHER.

3. What is my oldest childhood memory?
a) J. Hines peeing on the boys' bathroom wall -- kindergarden
b) Cutting my head on a chair leg at the bank -- age 2
c) Afternoon walks with my mom through the neighborhood, spelling W-A-T-E-R on
sewer lids -- age 4
d) burning my eyelashes and -brows on the cake at my first birthday party.

ANSWER: B. "A" and "C" ARE ACTUAL MEMORIES, "D" IS ENTIRELY MADE UP.

4. What is my current favorite song of all time?
a) "All I Need" by Radiohead
b) "Brothers on a Hotel Bed" by Death Cab for Cutie
c) "Ultraviolet (Light My Way)" by U2

ANSWER: A. I'VE LISTENED TO THIS SONG A LOT, AND I STILL GET GOOSEBUMPS EVERY TIME. GREAT BEAT, GREAT BUILD, GREAT SINGING. IF THIS SONG HAD BEEN AROUND WHEN I WAS 14, I PROBABLY WOULD'VE COMMITTED SUICIDE TO IT.

5. I prefer to wear:
a) boxers
b) briefs
c) boxer-briefs
d) commando
e) bikini briefs
f) thong

ANSWER: C. VERY OCCASIONAL "A" AND "D".

6. My least favorite coin is:
a) penny
b) nickel
c) dime
d) quarter
e) Kennedy half-dollar
f) Susan B. Anthony dollar
g) Sacajawea dollar

ANSWER: B. FUCKING NICKELS.

7. I have 3 bullets. Who gets them?
a) D. Finlaysen, A. Beanstock, B. White (local NPR personalities)
b) E.V. Arnold, Ross, Beatles Guy (B&N loons)
c) George W. Bush, Karl Rove, Ann Coulter (political players)
d) Dane Cook

ANSWER: A.

8. Favorite Soup?
a) vegetable
b) pea
c) ass
d) clam chowder

ANSWER: B. GIVE ME PEA SOUP OR GIVE ME, UH, SOMETHING ELSE.

9. What is my preferred style of government?
a) monarchy
b) democracy
c) communism
d) despotism

ANSWER: A. THERE'D BE SO MUCH LESS BULLSHIT IF WE JUST HAD ROYALS. OR, AT LEAST IT WOULD BE A DIFFERENT SORT OF BULLSHIT.

10. If I could live during any past era, it would be:
a) Wyoming, 1870
b) New York, 1950
c) England, Medieval Times
d) Dinosaur times

ANSWER: B. I'D GO HEAR SOME DIFFERENT JAZZ EVERY NIGHT.

11. My favorite nostalgic TV show is:
a) Growing Pains
b) Who's the Boss?
c) Silver Spoons

ANSWER: C, ALTHOUGH I WAS THINKING THE OTHER DAY THAT THE ACTUAL ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION IS PROBABLY 'LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE.'

EXTRA CREDIT



ESSAYS

Please write a short essay on one of the following topics:

1. Describe one of my typical days at the power plant.

WAKE UP SUPER ASS EARLY (IF I WAS WORKING AN A.M. SHIFT; P.M. SHIFT STARTED AT 2PM, AND THE OWL SHIFT STARTED AT 10PM), HIT 'JACK IN THE BOX' TO BUY 2 BREAKFAST JACKS FOR BREAKFAST AND 2 JUMBO JACKS FOR LUNCH. GET TO WORK, GET WORK ASSIGNMENT FOR THE DAY. SPEND 2.5 HOURS WALKING AROUND, 2.5 HOURS HIDING/SLEEPING, AND 2.5 HOURS IN THE BATHROOM. TAKE A SHOWER. GO HOME.

2. Describe a typical day for me in Kirksville, MO.

WAKE UP AROUND 10. SIT IN RON'S OFFICE UNTIL AROUND 4. EAT CHICKEN SANDWICHES. GO DRINK, SOMEWHERE.

3. Describe a typical day for me at the B&N.

COME TO WORK, STRAIGHTEN A FEW THINGS. STAND AND SAY 'HELLO' TO PEOPLE. AVOID CONVERSATIONS. CLEAN UP ANY STRAY TURDS. GO HOME.

The Best Day of My Life

I'm expecting today to be the best day of my life. Here's why:

For the past week or so, my life has looked like this:
1. 5:45am-7:15am - wake up, go to work.
2. 4:00pm-ish - leave work, go to theatre
3. 12:00am-ish - leave theatre, go home and sleep

I haven't gotten to see the J-Dog, I've been eating crap, and I've had no free time.

But today looks like this:

1. 9:15am - wake up
2. 9:30am-10:30am - watch LOST and eat ice cream
3. 10:30am-12:30pm - e-mails, dishes, music, cleaning
4. 1pm - MASSAGE
5. 2pm-5pm - errands, laundry
6. 6:15pm - me and the Jeanners meet PKP for dinner
7. 8pm - watch The Country Wife
8. 11pm - post show party
9. 12am - sleepy sleepy

I think it's gonna be pretty awesome. And really, the past week hasn't been too terribly awful, just way too long and busy. I've enjoyed working with the people who are working on the show, and I've enjoyed listening to The Unforgettable Fire at truly deafening volume while I drive. But I have seriously been missing the J-Dog. I got home a little earlier than usual last night, so she was still awake when I got home, and it was wonderful to just talk and laugh and shoot the shit.

Snow

It's been snowing here in the mornings every few days. Snow is pretty awesome. I like it.

I continue to be busy as hell.

When this show goes up, I'm going to use the massage gift certificate that my girlfriend gave me for my birthday.

Death!

Another false start dies on the table...

"Get On Your Boots" is not a good song.

I have heard the new U2 song, "Get On Your Boots," and I would like to go on record as saying that it is grade-A poop. Doo doo. Brian Eno, I am disappointed in you. Hopefully the rest of the album will be better.

I am currently reading John Adams. It's a very good book, and I usually hate non-fiction stuff. But the J-Dog and I watched the HBO miniseries about JA a few months ago, and it was good, and it made me want to read the book. So I'm reading the book. It's better than the miniseries, but I'm glad I saw the miniseries first. One complaint about the book: I think it would be better if the title was Juan Adams.

Thanks to everyone who took part in the DOB quiz. I'll post the answers sometime in the future, but I would like to say that Karista, you got a C because you didn't answer most of the questions (did you forget to turn the test over?), and OAA you got high marks for effort, but I unfortunately have to give you an F.

Been very busy working on stuff for the set. Jeannie and I have worked together at the Habitat shop a few nights, which has been nice. Not looking forward to spending my whole day and night off tomorrow working on show stuff.

The Quiz

First, let's start off with this video that K-Torr posted on Facebook:




I have the morning off, and it's the first weekday morning off that I've had in a long time. FORESHADOWING: I think I'm going to fix myself a version of my all-time favorite breakfast.

Jeannie and I went over to Katie's last night for dinner, and we had a good time, and a tasty lentil soup and kale salad and Guinness. I have discovered, though, that lentil soup seems to pack a lot of gunpowder into the ol' ass cannon, if you know what I mean. And I think you do.


Next: Work was super slow yesterday, so I had some time to work on the quiz that I mentioned the other day. Test your knowledge of DOB.

You have 1 hour to complete this test. Timing will be done on the honor system. Answers will be posted in a few days. Good luck.


1. What is my all-time favorite breakfast?
a) 2 bowls of Lucky Charms with milk, 1 banana.
b) 2 eggs over easy, 3 pieces of bacon or sausage patties, toast, juice.
c) 3 fried eggs, 1 can of black beans, 3 TBSP salsa, 1 TBSP lowfat greek-style
yogurt. Mash it all together.

2. How many siblings do I have?
a) 0
b) 1
c) 2
d) 3
e) 4

3. What is my oldest childhood memory?
a) J. Hines peeing on the boys' bathroom wall -- kindergarden
b) Cutting my head on a chair leg at the bank -- age 2
c) Afternoon walks with my mom through the neighborhood, spelling W-A-T-E-R on
sewer lids -- age 4
d) burning my eyelashes and -brows on the cake at my first birthday party.

4. What is my current favorite song of all time?
a) "All I Need" by Radiohead
b) "Brothers on a Hotel Bed" by Death Cab for Cutie
c) "Ultraviolet (Light My Way)" by U2

5. I prefer to wear:
a) boxers
b) briefs
c) boxer-briefs
d) commando
e) bikini briefs
f) thong

6. My least favorite coin is:
a) penny
b) nickel
c) dime
d) quarter
e) Kennedy half-dollar
f) Susan B. Anthony dollar
g) Sacajawea dollar

7. I have 3 bullets. Who gets them?
a) D. Finlaysen, A. Beanstock, B. White (local NPR personalities)
b) E.V. Arnold, Ross, Beatles Guy (B&N loons)
c) George W. Bush, Karl Rove, Ann Coulter (political players)
d) Dane Cook

8. Favorite Soup?
a) vegetable
b) pea
c) ass
d) clam chowder

9. What is my preferred style of government?
a) monarchy
b) democracy
c) communism
d) despotism

10. If I could live during any past era, it would be:
a) Wyoming, 1870
b) New York, 1950
c) England, Medieval Times
d) Dinosaur times

11. My favorite nostalgic TV show is:
a) Growing Pains
b) Who's the Boss?
c) Silver Spoons


EXTRA CREDIT



ESSAYS

Please write a short essay on one of the following topics:

1. Describe one of my typical days at the power plant.

2. Describe a typical day for me in Kirksville, MO.

3. Describe a typical day for me at the B&N.

Rebloggin'

Jeannie's brother, Jake, recently visited the Hoover Dam, and posted this picture on his blog. It's a sign at the dam that lists some of the lingo used by the folks who built the damn. As you can see, those folks was dirty as hell. Banjoes and Crutches, indeed. Step aside, Donkey Punch, here comes the Candy Wagon.

I worked outside on the set today after working at my real job, and it was cold as shit. My poor little nubbin fingers got all frozed up.

Rev. Al

I have decided to legally change the name of my car from "The Reverend Al Crawford" to "The Reverend Al Crawford Slater". That way, I can still refer to him as "The Reverend Al", or just "Al," but I can also call him "The Reverend A.C. Slater." There. It is done.

Jeannie and I have not known where to start with this whole "maybe buying a house" thing, so on Saturday morning we had a meeting at a place called Live Baltimore, where you can basically just go in and ask a realtor questions about buying a house in Baltimore. It was super helpful. If you're thinking of buying a house in Balto (or as we like to call it, "Chesapeake Shakesb'more", ) I'd recommend it.

Is diarrhea funny because it's a funny word, or because it refers to liquid poop?

I've been having lots of weird dreams lately. Many of them involving Ricky Elz. The other night I had one where me and Ricky and Bosco were riding in the back of a car that was being driven by some high school girls, and the high school girls drove to their high school and us guys were waiting for them in the back of the car while they ran inside to get something, and we were talking about how back in the day it would've been really cool to be in the car with three high school girls, but now it just seemed kinda dumb. And Bosco said, "The only thing I want from these high school girls right now is for one of them to watch my kid so I can take a nap." Which I thought was pretty funny.

I think I had that dream because Jeannie and I had recently watched a "Family Ties" episode where young high schooler Mallory had to fend off unwelcome sexual advances from creepy family friend "Uncle Arthur."

I've been super busy lately, spending a lot of my free time working on the set. It's going pretty well. I feel well prepared, mainly because I've been making construction drawings and actually planning out what I need to build before I show up to build it. Strangely helpful.

I think that sometime in the future I'm going to post a quiz called "How Well Do You Know DOB?" I was thinking about it today in the shower.

Busy as Hell, Bitches.

I been busy as hell, bitches.

But tonight me and the ladyfriend are goin' on a date.

Dinner Time

It's a nice time of day on a Sunday. Dinner time. I'm making the sauce and prepping the vegetables and defrosting some tofu for a kick-ass stir fry. Writing this makes me sound like I'm a good cook or that I'm that one that makes the good meals in our house, but the truth is that the Jeanners usually does all the heavy lifting when we make something for dinner that is more involved than pasta, pizza, or veggie burgers. But she's at the gym. So I'm trying to be helpful and getting shit ready so that she can do the actual stir frying when she gets home. Because large pans full of boiling oil scare me. Probably because I cook shirtless a lot.

So the sauce is done (4 cloves of garlic!), and I'm listening to the "good jazz" playlist on the ol' MP3 player, which I'm convinced is probably one of the greatest playlists in existence on Earth. It really is good. All instrumental stuff from the 50's and early sixties, except for Frank Sinatra's In the Wee Small Hours, an album which, hopefully obviously, has vocals.

I lost a bet this evening. I bet Jeannie that Eddie's market would have chili garlic paste, and she bet that it wouldn't. I was so sure that it would. I was so very sure that I told Jeannie that when we got to the market, I was going to buy 2 jars of chili garlic paste, one to use in the recipe and one to smear all over her face. Because she lost the bet. But she didn't lose the bet. I lost the bet. But we ended up finding some chili garlic paste at the cute little halal market where we buy flatbreads. It really is cute. But I hate losing bets.

We got some good work done today, transporting the set pieces that we built at the Habitat Shop over to the theatre, where they will live for the next couple of months while they get prettied up for the show.

Why is the overhead light on in our kitchen? Yuck.

Alright. Time to cut vegetables.

Whoa, I almost forgot to add that the other day I was looking at James Taylor's christmas CD and I decided that I have an inexplicable hatred of James Taylor. I kinda just want to punch him in his face. But he seems like he'd be an OK guy, so I don't know why I have that feeling. I also want to punch Carly Simon, but that's because her last CD was an insult to the human race.

Auld Lang Syne

Does anybody know what "Auld Lang Syne" means? Neither do I. So last night, while Jeannie and I were over at Katie's for New Year's Eve, we decided it means, basically, the equivalent of "oh well." As in:

"Oh no! I've missed the train and now I'm late for work! Auld lang syne."

"Shoot! I just spilled coffee on my brand new trousers! Auld lang syne."

"I've forgotten all my old acquaintances! Auld lang syne."

My car is in the shop, because a mystery belt is squealing loudly and randomly, and the J-Dog and I had to get up early yesterday to drive it there. And then I had to go to work, and then after work Jeannie picked me up and we got some Thai food and went over to Katie's, where we watched The Kite Runner (which, we pretty much all agreed, was not a very good movie), and sang/hummed "Auld Lang Syne" (complete with harmony). We were home by 11 and promptly asleep, and did not wake up for any fireworks/random-Baltimore-gunfire that may have occurred at midnight.

While in St. Louis over Christmas I got a bunch of clothes that belonged to my Uncle Larry. Some of the clothes make me look and feel like Jimmy Buffett, especially a pair of turdy mustard brown loafers for which the J-Dog displays a keen dislike, but hey, free clothes.

Also, speaking of clothes, I read in Entertainment Weekly that 'lumberjack chic' is now "in." Finally, the look I've been sporting for well nigh 12 years now is starting to get some props.

I have one New Year's Resolution: use my time better. Yep, I am adopting the hoary old chestnut, Carpe Diem, as my motto for 2009. I think I'm gonna start by getting my ballsack pierced.

Golddigger

Well, our '08 Christmas trip home is over. Some of the highlights:

1. On the flight to the Lou, Jeannie and I watched a twenty-something pick her nose for a good 20-30 minutes. Basically, anytime during the flight that she was awake, she was picking her nose. Awesome.

2. Response to the bushier beard seemed generally positive.

3. Familial response to the fact that Jeannie and I are going to start looking for a house in Baltimore was generally positive. Folks (including friends in the realty business) agreed that it is a good time to try and buy.

One of the lowlights of the trip is that our age is starting to very obviously catch up with us, as we were back at her parents' place and in bed by 11 or 12 every night we were there. Lame.

Nonetheless, it was good to see many party people. And the trip was not too rushed. And although I was experiencing a bit of general malaise, I still enjoyed myself.

Eating Pizza Makes My Mustache Smell Like Vomit

This year has felt very strange at work. Just...strange. 'Tis neither bad nor good. Whatever.

Tying up a few loose ends:

I finished Infinite Jest about 2 weeks ago. As always, I immediately wanted to go back to the beginning and start reading it again. I refrained, and instead have been reading A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again. I think, come January, I shall start reading Don Delillo's White Noise. Why not.

For the last few days I have regretted writing about interest rates in my last post. I do not want to be the type of person who blogs about interest rates. I also do not want to be the type of person who thinks very often about interest rates. I would guess that thinking about money is at the root of a lot of the troubles and worries and problems in the world, and that's a tub of crap into which I do not want to throw my hat. So instead I'm going to think about getting some sort of electronic drum kit and working on making it sound like a real drum kit. Also going to put thought into the set I'm working on, and how to make it nice. And how to make it cheaply. It's fun to think about wood.

Yesterday the Jeanners and I went to a memorial service for T. Long, who was a close friend of MAW's and who we didn't know super-well, but we had hung out a few times, and I had come to really like his work as a director and an actor. Plus, he just seemed like an all-around good and interesting guy. Mid-forties. Sudden heart attack. I thought the memorial service was well done, and a few people said some very nice things. And it's hard to be at a memorial service for someone who died suddenly, and to be listening to the things people were saying, and not think about the way in which you live your life, and the things people would say about you if you died tomorrow. I think that pretty much I don't care what people might say about me, as long as they were able to say 2 things: I loved my friends and I loved the J-Dog. And that I did those things well. I think that when it comes down to it, those are the only 2 things in the world I care about. And interest rates.

I would also like to take this opportunity to publicly (and perhaps inappropriately) request that no Josh Groban be played at my funeral. Stick to Tom Waits.

Also, I would like to be buried at sea.

Also, if there is a funeral before I am buried at sea, I would like to be wearing a wig when I am laid out. Color and style unimportant.

I think that those are all the post-mortum requests that I have at the moment.

Tomorrow: Nachos and Beer with Bewley. Jealous, aren't you.

Holidays '08

Well, I usually don't go a week between posts. No good excuse, really. Work is getting busier, but not busy enough. It's been kinda frustrating for the last week or so, but mainly I think just because everyone is stressed about the "tough economic climate." Whatever the reason, it hasn't been laid back and fun this season, and I blame mostly myself for that. And Bewley. And Korn. Ha Ha.

On my day off on Monday, Jeannie arranged for me to be able to work in the Habitat wood shop, so I was able to get lumber delivered and start working on the set for "The Country Wife". It was really wonderful to be working in a full shop again, to have room to work, and all the materials and tools that I needed. Sigh. One day CSC will have all this type of stuff on-site, I hope. Would make life much easier. But anyway, it was fun on Monday to be working. And I realized that I cannot work on a set without thoughts of Ron Ryb flooding the ol' memory all day. A good thing.

Can't wait for Christmas to be here, can't wait to get back to The Lou (even if it is going to be a lightning-quick trip) and see friends and family. Can't wait for work to go back to normal.

Jeannie and I are planning on diving in to house hunting when we come back for the new year. Meeting with money folks, etc. I keep hearing of all the interest-rate cuts happening, and start rubbing the ol' hands together. I'm thinking that it really is going to be a decent time to buy a house. And the Jeanners is getting super-excited about having a place of our own (read: a porch and a large garden).

Well, I've got the day off today. I need to run some errands, but I think I'm not gonna start until I've had a tasty breakfast of eggs and black beans. Remember when I used to eat bacon all the time? Jeez.

Multiple Blasts From the Distant Past

I just decided to have a piece of that lovely apple pie for breakfast. I'll be right back...

DAMN, this is good pie. And the best part is that last night, Jeannie told me that she doesn't like it and it made her tummy hurt, so she's not going to eat any more of it. So I get the whole rest of the pie for myself. But really, I'm attacking it with pretty regular voraciousness, so it won't be around much longer.

Is there a better word than 'voraciousness' for the noun-form of 'voracious'? I think there is (maybe voracity?) but I'm too lazy to look it up.

Last night I spent a good portion of the evening friending people from grade school on Facebook and uploading old pictures. It is truly a trip. Very surreal seeing people that I haven't seen in 20 years, all growed up and with kids. Kinda makes me feel old, but not too bad. I don't think I've changed too much since then, though. Equal parts silly and serious. Equal parts happy and sad. Balanced. The only major things I've lost since then are excitement and, to a lesser degree, some curiosity. I don't miss the excitement, but I wish I could get some of the curiosity back.

The Jeanners had her last Physics class last night. It's strange, but I think she'll miss it. I think she enjoyed being good at something at which she thought she would be lousy.

I'm off work today. Many dishes to be done, and a trip to the gym. Maybe a long run.

Worked on some music last night. Recorded, took a break and went for a walk, came back and listened to the recording and it sounded like shite. Oh well. I guess that happens about 90% of the time, but the 10% that it doesn't is worth the effort.

Cheek, Cheek, Sack, Dick, Leg, Leg.

I've had some music sitting around, hoping something something would spring from it, but nothing has. So screw it. Here it is:



Jeannie made an apple pie last night, and I think it's the best apple pie I've ever had.

Thanks to all who voted in "Decision '08: Dough". The polls are still open.

Dough

Informal poll here:

Do you like eating raw dough? Doesn't matter what kind of dough. Could be pizza dough, could be pie crust, just any kind of uncooked dough. For the sake of the poll, though, let's leave out cookie dough because everybody knows that it's delicious.

Dough. Tell me all about it.

Okra, Enough to Choke Ya

Woke up this morning cosmically Bored, with a capital B, feeling blah. Yet had plenty to do. Just procrastinating. So I spent the morning sitting in the tub and chain-watching Sports Night episodes.

Been listening to some Chris Smither lately (who I would recommend for fans of ol' Greg Brown), and when I listen, the songs take me right back to our Alaska trip earlier this year, which was when I first listened to any of his stuff. I can totally picture Spiff and I in his kitchen, rolling dice, drinking Guinness, a bright morning light coming through the window, smell of eggs and bacon, listening to a lot of good tunes.

The J-Dog and I have been talking lately about our plans for the future, specifically house-buying and J-Dog-school-returning-to. We're thinking it's probably a pretty darn good time to look at houses, what with interest rates being real low and house prices dropping. And we've got some money in the bank that ain't doin' nothing. And it's a bad time to quit a job and move elsewhere, so it's looking like '09 might be the year that D-Bone and J-Dog hunker down and start playing Grown Up.

I'm off tomorrow, and I'm planning on doing some preliminary-type work on the set for the show I'm starting to work on, "The Country Wife", which will be going up in February. And laundry. Gotsta do laundry.

Magically Delicious

Back in June I went on a diet and started exercising, and ever since then I've been running a few times a week (more often in the summer, somewhat less in the fall/winter but still pretty regularly). Tonight I went running in the rain after a nice dinner over at Eric and Lauren's (who this afternoon kindly invited us over for dinner). Usually when I'm running I think about death or something like that, but tonight I was thinking about Art, and about Lucky Charms.

Lucky Charms is the best cereal, and when I was young I didn't really understand why it is the best cereal, I just enjoyed it. But as I got older and tried different things, I began to understand why it is the best cereal. One of the things that I tried that helped me to understand why Lucky Charms succeeds in being the best cereal was attempting to eat all of the oats and leave myself a bowl full of marshmallows. I figured that getting all of the oat-eating out of the way would leave me, at the end of the bowl, with about 10 bites worth of pretty much pure sunshine happiness. But I learned it wasn't true. For me, anyway. Spoonfuls of marshmallows were not as good as a mix. A balance. Of oats and marshmallows.

And here's the really important thing that I've learned since then: it's the oats that make Lucky Charms a cereal that can be regularly and consistently enjoyed--I could eat it every day and still be OK with it. And it's because of the oats. Just marshmallows I would get sick of pretty quick.

I think the Lucky Charms folks get it right because they have more oats than marshmallows. The marshmallows are there pretty much just to spice things up a little bit, but it's really the oats that keep you coming back for a lifetime.

And the same is probably true of Art. For the analogy, I think of marshmallows as things that are florid, poetic, aesthetically beautiful -- the chorus, the hook, the really nice lighting; I think of oats as things that are mundane, boring, simple, quiet. The verses. The general wash.

Bob Dylan songs are, to me, the Lucky Charms of music; it's why they've stood the test of time. There's some great poetry in them, but there's a shit ton of incredibly mundane lines, too. The things are composed entirely of verses and no chorus, for the most part. And even breaking it down further, the lines are generally composed of oat words with a few marshmallows that are the ones that steer the line downward into your gut. And the music behind it all is usually pretty generic, repetitive, unassuming. Oat music.

So, the point of this all, I guess, is just a reminder to myself, to return to: if I start working on more music, I'm gonna focus on the oats.

Larry

I found out today that my uncle Larry died yesterday. He was a good guy. My mom's sister, Pauline, married him when I was around 13 or 14, I think, and he became well-loved by the family real fast. Super-nice, warm, welcoming, always smiling. Always said what was on his mind, and his words showed that there were usually nice things in his mind. I'll miss him, and I know my mom and dad will miss him a lot, too. And of course, my aunt.

But, I was told that he went home last night after a couple of different Thanksgiving dinners, sat in his chair, and a little while later fell over dead. Not a bad way to go. He deserved a gentle death.

That's all I got for right now. Thanksgiving was fine. Black Friday was fine.

Sally the Saw.

I rarely feel the desire to have relations with inanimate objects [anymore], but I bought this compound miter saw for CSC yesterday and I am totally in love. I have wanted the company to have a chop saw since, like, day numero uno, but felt that we were never in a position to spend the cash on one until now-ish. That's probably not true. We probably could've bought one at any point but for some unknown reason didn't. But the point is that now we have one and I love her and I've named her Sally.

It's the day before Thanksgiving, the bestest of all the holidays. I sure will be missing all the cool kids this Thanksgiving. It just ain't the same without them. We are, however, currently in talks planning for a fake-Thanksgiving sometime this spring, which is exciting.

I have made a kick-ass Christmas song mix to play at the store during this exciting holiday season. It includes classics such as "Do They Know It's Christmas?" by Band-Aid, "Last Christmas" by WHAM!, and "All I Want for Christmas is You" by Mariah Carey. And others. I'll also be bringing in my Herb Alpert X-mas CD, and the Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack, a perennial B&N favorite, which for some reason was left off the offical B&N 2008 approved In-Store playlist.

Our radiators are actually working this year. It's a pleasant change.

Have a happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

(should I have put a comma after Thansgiving? Anyone?)

Sweep the Leg

Last night the J-Dog and I practiced a little dancing, then we practiced a little karate (jump kicks), and then we went for a walk. I learned that even though 5 years have passed since I quit smoking, I am unable to walk by a cigarette pack on the ground without stopping to see if it has any cigarettes in it.

I am sad that even though Jeannie and I were practicing our karate moves, I was still unable to entice her to watch the Karate Kid.

Had a dream last night that Sean, Schlueter and I were in rehab. Jeannie was also there, but just because she was visiting. Everybody at rehab liked Sean because he played guitar and sang. Everybody there didn't like Schlueter because she was trying to get everybody to smoke cigarettes, even though we had all quit. And Sean had an affair with our rehab counselor. That was my dream.

I'm gonna buy a chop saw this week for CSC.

Nada.

Not too much going on. Been busy at work. It snowed the other day!

I'll be damned if that big ol' annoying fly isn't still flying around our living room. And it's still annoying.

The Exception That Proves the Rule

The other day at work, a coworker and I were talking about blogs and blogging, and I said that 'the days when nothing happens are when the posts get really interesting.' Hmmmm. Today I'm doubting the veracity of that statement. Not much happened today so let's see if we can make this an interesting post.


Had a whack dream last night involving the Bosco family, Alaska, Sean and Nicole and two guys I didn't recognize, a broken bicycle chain, a funeral, the J-Dog, and staying with my parents in a hotel.

I'm sitting on the couch, and the sun is going down behind the church dome across the street. No birds in sight. A crisp sunset, no clouds, the colors changing in definite lines rather than an explosive bleed.

I used the master key to our building (which I [mistakenly and unbeknownst to others] possess) to explore the now-vacant apartment on the first floor of our building. It's pretty huge, and although the basement is very large and has a washer and dryer, it was also kinda musty and mildewy smelling.

Someone (I think next door) is listening to Tori Amos very loudly. Shame on them. Doubly.

Today at work I was in a good mood, and I'm feeling pretty good about the way things are set up for Christmas. My unsucessful lobbying for people of a few weeks ago has bloomed into success, so I'm hoping that, although X-mas will be busy, it won't be crazy. Or too painful.

Every day I'm looking more and more like Shel. Head balder, beard bushier.

I'm about 7/8's of the way through Infinite Jest. A line that stood out: "It's weird to feel like you miss someone you're not even sure you know." Very true, DFW.

In case you were wondering, I just spent a ridiculous amount of time looking for that quote. I remembered reading it, and it struck a chord, but then when I went to look for it I couldn't remember if I read it recently or a week or two ago or what. I won't say how long it took me to find it, but it was far too long. It's on page 589, if you're interested. I basically reread the first 589 pages in order to find that damned quote.

Alright I'm done.

Dancing in the Dark

The Jeanners and I went out and celebrated our anniversary last night. We started out by going to a Mexican restaurant called El Salto II, which I thought was promising for its El Jimador/Chuy Arzola vibe but the food was kinda bland. Oh well. Then we headed out to the American Legion Hall in Towson for the Friday Night Dance.

A little preface: a while ago, Aimee and I had been talking about how it would be fun to go dancing, but not at a Baltimore meat-market style club, what we were looking for was something more like a wedding reception but without the wedding.

And the Friday Night Dance in Towson was pretty much like a wedding reception, except it was like a wedding reception where everybody was at least a good dancer. I'd say that Jeannie and I were in the bottom 1 percent of the dancers there. But it was a good mixture of ages, from probably 16 to 80, and a nice mix of casual and dressy outfits. And the band was kinda boring but decent enough to dance to. We had a good time, and I'm guessing we'll probably go back again sometime in the future. You up for it, A-Train?

Not much else to report. The weather has turned to usual November weather, and it's been rainy. I got caught in a little one-minute hurricane today walking from my car to work.

Jeannie is making fun of my typing. She is cruising for divort.

Four more years! Four more years!

Today is the fourth wedding anniversary of D-Bone and J-Dog. Please take a moment to stop whatever you're doing and join in the worldwide celebratory dance-a-thon. I sure hope Jeannie takes a minute out of her Physics class tonight to join in the celebratory dance-a-thon. (That squeaky sound you hear is the sound of a lone tear slowly making its way down my cheek.)

There's a big goddamn fly buzzing around our living room! Goddamn it, fly!

So much to write about I don't know where to begin...

Jeez, that big fly is annoying!

Last night Aimee came over for a long-planned and oft-postponed fondue party. Actually, it might have only been postponed once, but we haven't seen Aimee since last February, so this party was a long time comin'. I think it turned out pretty awesome. Hot melty cheese, tofu sausage, roasted cauliflower, apple cubes, delicious bread, muthaf*****' ham cubes, a bright and savory salad, and decadent cheese cake (4 varieties!) for dessert. Plus, we did some great internet research, most of which centered on the Sheen/Estevez dynasties. If you're ever planning a Sheen/Estevez trivia night, and you need to learn some fun-facts about either Ramon Gerardo Antonio "Martin Sheen" Estevez or Carlos Eugene "Charlie Sheen" Estevez, I recommend trucking on over to their respective Wikipedia pages. You will learn things. I especially was fascinated by the info on Martin Sheen's arms and their (the arms') relation to the way he puts on a jacket.

I also learned that Martin Sheen is not the father of all of the 'Young Guns.' Not even Lou Diamond Phillips (who we also researched a little bit.).

We also learned that there really is (sadly) a website called www.deadhookerremoval.com.

So anyway, it was fun. And at the tail end of the fondue party, PKP came over, because he was spending the night at our place because he and I had to be up in Towson early this morning for a performance of Macbeth, and he didn't feel like driving all the way back down to DC last night after his rehearsal. So he came over and parked on the wrong block, and then once he got to our apartment, he sat in this really squeaky chair and squeaked the whole time. Until he moved to a different chair. And then Aimee went home, and we blew up the ol' air mattress for Pat, and then we all went sleepy sleepy.

Then I got up early this morning because I had to be at the theatre at 7am, and I told Pat that I'd see him there and I went out the door (Pat didn't have to be there until 8am). And then I had been working at the theatre for a little while when the stage manager got a call from Pat, who told her that his car had been towed (from the block near but not quite in front of our house. Our neighborhood has fairly complex and bullshitty parking rules.). So that was super sucky and I feel really terrible, because it costs way too much money to get your car from the impound lot in Baltimore. Pat did tell me, though, that he yelled at the guy who was hooking his car to the tow truck (Pat arrived at the car just as it was being towed), and used lots of bad words and yelled at him (the tow guy) in a manner in which he had not yelled at anyone in a very long time. That people on the street turned and stared. This image makes me feel a little better. But I still feel bad.

So anyway, I think that brings us pretty close to up-to-date. I saw gas today for $1.97, the Macbeth performances went off without a hitch (I was just there for technical guidance and to act as a sort of assistant stage manager), I spent the afternoon doing dishes and eating leftover ham cubes, and then I bought a postcard with The Jesus on it to give to my wife. And that big goddamn fly is still buzzing around.

Tomorrow night the Jeanners and I will actually get to celebrate with dinner and questionable American Legion Hall dancing.

Sleepy Tears

Last night I woke up in the middle of the night and I was crying. Weird. Never had that happen before. I had been having a sad/weird dream about my mom dying [at the old power plant where I worked.] [holding 2 Marlon Brando DVD's.][Those are the weird parts]. What's also weird is that just the other night, Jeannie was laughing in her sleep, and I thought about what a strange thing it was that your brain is creating images vivid enough to make your unconscious body start laughing.

Last night before we went to sleep, Jeannie and I were laying in bed, cracking each other up. We decided that it's a good thing we're married, because neither of us could ever find anyone else who thinks we're that funny. She did tell me though, that I have the tendency to use the same jokes over and over again. Duh.

It feels like autumn has lasted an exceptionally long time this year. At least, it seems like the trees have been colorful and beautiful for a long time. I feel like usually by November it's gray and glassy and cold and the trees are black sticks. Not so this year.

Busy day tomorrow at work. All the Christmas stuff gets set up. 'Tis the muthaf*****' season.

I'm your density.

While doing research for this post, I learned that there are 13225 days until the presidential inauguration that will be held on Friday, January 20th, 2045. I will be 67 years old then. God bless the Internet.


It's November 5th, and that tells me three very important things:

1. It's Jack Steinmetz' first birthday. Happy birthday, Jack! Congratulations on some wonderful development!

2. It's Spiff Chambers' birthday. Happy birthday, Spiff! Congratulations on some wonderful development!

3. It's the day Marty McFly went back in time. Let's have a moment of silence as we think about this...


Speaking of Spiff Chambers, he's having a big CD release party this Saturday night, so if you're free, stop on by Maxine's in Girdwood, Alaska. Also, his CD is available from CDBaby. You should buy it.

How about that Barack Obama? Now, he just needs to live in a secure bunker deep beneath the earth and eat only pre-tasted food for the next 76 days. I am happy he won, and now I'm scared for him.