Disappears in Dreams

The other day, Jeannie and I were taking a nap, and I was having a weird dream where I was in a video game, and there were co-workers running around through the video game with me, and Sam was a little video game version of Dracula (don't ask how that works, it would take too long to explain) and it was all very weird, but then at the end of the dream I was just holding Sam (in his little Dracula outfit) and he just disappeared.  It was terrible.  I woke up crying, and it still makes me cry when I think about it.  Because in the dream it was like he was dying, he was DISAPPEARING FOREVER, and I would never see him again, and I knew it, and he seemed to know it, and it was terrible and it broke my heart. 

Dada is beefy

Not much going on really.

Ooo - The other night I was laying in bed thinking about the following statement -- "The greatest thing in the world is ___________." -- and how I would end it.  I came up with 'chinese food.'  Cause chinese food really is the greatest thing in the world.  What do you think is the greatest thing in the world?

Also decided:  my anti-drug is lemonade.  What's your anti-drug?

Last night I was able to smell my own butt without changing my position seated on the couch.  Never good.  The result of no-shower and old underwear.  Don't act like it's never happened to you. 

This post was written on my phone (Jeannie doesn't let me use our computer anymore).  Please celebrate my perfect spelling and punctuation.  Or, maybe not perfect but at least pretty damned fine. 

I should really go paint the radiator cover.  And no, that is not code. 

Anal punchers, rectal scrunchers

Whenever I see the word "recital" in print, I ALWAYS first mistake it as "rectal."

On Wednesdays and Thursdays, I drop Sam off in the morning at the babysitter's, and then I get to come home and take a leisurely shower and make myself a leisurely semi-lumberjack breakfast, and maybe read something short, and then head off to work.  Which I am doing today.  And I usually enjoy it very much, and I am at least semi-enjoying it today.  But I've been noticing lately how much I enjoy hearing Sam run around the house, giggling and screaming and babbling, and how, when he is not around, life can feel too silent and claustrophobic.  Which is weird, because one of my biggest fears before having a kid is that I would miss my beloved "peace and quiet" too much, and that I would resent my kid for getting rid of it.  Well, it's true, the kid has mostly gotten rid of it, but I don't seem to miss it too much.  Peace and quiet feels a little too empty these days.  Not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing. 

Related:  I always used to feel like I didn't have a whole lot to lose, and I always regarded this as a good thing.  These days I feel like I have a lot to lose, and while that feels very good, it also feels very bad. 

Related:  I always used to talk myself out of worrying about things by asking myself, "What's the worst that could happen?"  And the answer would usually be, "That person will yell at me," or "I will lose my shitty job."  These days the answers carry more weight, like, "My kid could die," or "I will lose this job that I really seem to love."  Again, this is both great and terrible.  How can I talk myself out of worrying now?

I'm looking forward to this weekend, for no reason in particular. 

I had, perhaps, the best hot chocolate of my life yesterday. 

Writer's Almanac

I think Samuel may have officially entered his "terrible two's" "annoying" phase.  Maybe.  It's not "terrible," but it is pretty annoying.  He's kind of latched on to a few things (listening to music all day, sitting at the steering wheel for a minute before going anywhere in the car) and then freaks out when he doesn't get to do those things.  Basically, just kinda freaking out whenever he doesn't get what he wants.  Ugh.  I'm glad that I spent the summer with him BEFORE all this hit.  Jeannie's been home a lot with him for the last few weeks and I think she's about ready to throw him off a bridge a little bit.

Luckily, he is, at times, still very cute.  Like when he says, "potato," or leans in and gives spontaneous kisses. 

Anyway, enough about the boy. 

The fam and I went to ChesShakes new years' party today, which was uneventful.  Consisted mostly of trying to make sure that Sam wasn't throwing himself in the fireplace or breaking anything. 

I really enjoy listening to "The Writer's Almanac" in the car.  Since I never get to listen to them on the radio, I download the podcasts, save them up, and listen to a week's worth on Friday mornings when I drive to work.  It's a little bit of a treat. 

2013 was a good year for me, mainly because of job-switching, but also because I think that, as a family, Jeannie and Sam and I learned some things about trying to balance all the stuff that we need in our lives. 

What do I wish for 2014?  Of course, continued health and stuff for the people I love, but also:

1.  successful new building opening
2.  kitchen renovation
3.  figuring out how vacations work at the new job
4.  a bulk purchase of RUNTS candy
5.  Lemonade, all the time.
6.  Spreadable port wine cheese and reduced-fat Wheat Thins.

I got myself a new pillow after Christmas.  So far I'm really liking it.  I sleep in all different positions, so, historically, it's been hard for me to find a pillow that I like.  And my last pillow sucked (basically like sleeping on a piece of padded paper), so I am excited that this one seems to cut the pillow-mustard.